Working Toward Your Dreams — the Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Part of my thing is no bullshit. I believe in honesty, being blunt but tactful, standing by those you love, supporting each other, and collaborating when it’s smart and makes sense for everyone.

Unfortunately, all of my values and beliefs don’t always line up perfectly, the things that influence me (which is everything… I’m an empath) need to be filtered and observed so that I don’t fall into negative thought patterns and sabotage myself, and when life throws you way too many curve balls to handle at once, what happens to your dreams?

My entire family is in the middle of a shit storm right now, and there isn’t much any of us can do to yield immediate results because the shit hitting the fan right now is all over the place and consists of all long-term, major problems to handle/take care of/live through/try to fix.

And that’s why I have to keep fighting.

I’ve been racking my heart, mind, and soul trying to figure out what the purpose of all of this insanity might be. Is it to test my resolve? My patience? My ability to finally take what I’ve learned and apply it?

Who knows? Asking these questions is only going to make me crazy, so here are a few ways to stay on top of things and focused if life decides to throw you some crises you have to work around.

Personal problems have a way of weaseling their way into your plans and trying to muck them up. If they’re minor issues, they usually don’t present a problem… however, if they’re big problems, you may want to keep certain things in mind and do the mental work that will get you through it.

  1. Your initial reaction might be shock, and depending on each individual, this can manifest itself in various different ways. When you hear or learn shocking or terrible news, it may hit you right away or it may not. Just keep in mind that you will likely experience a feeling of numbness or jumping into action for seemingly no reason.
  2. Your next reaction might be anger. Feel what you feel. There’s no use in fighting the emotions that wash over you once the shock wears off. If you notice yourself getting angry, irritated, or losing control, make it a point not to take it out on those around you. Instead, go do something different… clean, shower, do yoga, whatever you need to do to work through the emotions and get back to functioning normally throughout your day.
  3. The next phase might be one in which you find yourself feeling a sort of desperation to make things go back to the way they were. This is natural; don’t fight it. However, while you’re going through this process, keep in mind that change is not inherently bad; lots of change is good, so this change might be good, too… or at least lead to something good.
  4. The fourth stage is a sort of giving up and succumbing to what’s happening, although you might feel very blah and lethargic about the whole thing. This is also normal, and now you’re almost done — again, feel what you feel and go through what you’re going through, but stay open to the next phase and remember that everything is only temporary.
  5. The fifth stage is acceptance, and this is the goal to reach for everything to start getting back to normal.Yes, these are very much like the five stages of grief, and they can be applied to all sorts of losses and major changes in life. Any and all big changes are perceived in our minds with some sense of loss and a fear of the unknown (because we don’t truly know what lies beyond the change, do we?), so it stands to reason that we go through the same grieving process for other crises as we do for the loss of a person.

Have you experienced any crises lately? Have they interfered with your dreams? If so, what did you do to move past them?


Originally published at www.nobullselfpublishing.com.