Nashville, TN college admissions counselor

Sophia Smith
Sep 5, 2018 · 3 min read

As a Nashville, TN college admissions counselor, I recently received a question from the following parent…

My son is waiting to hear from colleges. He’s nervous and anxious. How can I help him deal with rejection or regrets? How can I help my teen choose which school to go to if he gets accepted to several and doesn’t have a first choice?

My answer…

The waiting period can be a tense time in any household, but it’s important to keep spirits high and not focus solely on checking the mail or online portal all day long.

What’s done is done. You cannot magically go back to your teen’s tenth-grade year and fix that chemistry class, or remove the downward trend in achievement he experienced in grade nine. Even though it’s always great to have a “reach school,” students need to be realistic about their chances of getting in and apply to schools that best fit their academic credentials. It’s a competitive world out there and college is no different. Thousands of students are vying for the same spot that your son or daughter is trying to earn. Again — another reason why starting the college search before senior year is helpful and productive.

Read My Four Tips to Consider While Waiting for College Decision Letters

Don’t Dwell

After ensuring that the colleges have received every piece of documentation required for review, just sit back. Don’t make this a constant topic of conversation at the dinner table. Analyzing over what “should have been done” is a waste of energy. Savor the time that you have left with your teenager at home this year and trust that in the end, your teen will be attending the school that is right for him/her.

Empower Your Teenager

Do not open the admission decision letter. When I worked in the college admissions office, I once had a mother tell me that she had been hiding her daughter’s denial letter from a college for two months because she didn’t want to see her daughter upset. This was inappropriate on so many levels. Bottom line: Your son/daughter is the one who should face the letter–regardless of what’s inside the envelope. This is a lesson your teen is learning. Being able to handle acceptance or rejection is part of life.

Don’t Pressure Them To Make a Decision Based on What You Want

The next four years is your son or daughter’s life. Don’t pressure your teenager to attend a school because that’s where you would have gone. Empower your teenager to self-reflect and decide what’s best for them.

Look at The Overall Picture

Work with your teenager to create an organized list of pros and cons for each admitted institution. Include factors such as cost, location, distance from a major city, major options, student body size, research opportunities, internship availabilities, post-graduate opportunities, study abroad, student to faculty ratio should all be considered. What about scholarship offerings? What are the financial aid packages? Map it all out for each college.

Don’t forget that colleges require an enrollment deposit to hold a spot in the incoming class. May 1 is the universal enrollment deposit deadline, but it’s always best to check with each school to make sure nothing is missed.

Jamie Brown Kennedy, Educational Consultant

brown-kennedy.com

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