Oops! Pro-lifers Help Illegal Immigrants

Illegal immigrants in the United States don’t know it, but they ought to be grateful to the unceasing efforts of the “Personhood” movement. Those good activists are working to legally designate fetuses as living Persons. Through hard work and fundraising, they are quietly gaining ground in the fight to officially pinpoint the start of life at conception.

Think of that Ohio prosecutor who sought murder charges against Ariel Castro, the Cleveland kidnapper, for allegedly forcing miscarriages in his victim and wrongfully causing the death of a fetus.

And Personhood-ers have have recently outlawed a brand new form of murder called “fetal homicide” in 38 states. This dovetails with state-by-state efforts to prevent fetus death through limiting or prohibiting abortions.

Why should illegal immigrant be thrilled? Well, duh, life begins at conception, not birth! If the multi-cell masses that follow conception are awarded the legal status of Personhood, then those Persons must be citizens of one country or another. And if life begins at conception then it’s hard to deny that any fetus conceived in the U.S. would instantaneously, at the moment of conception, achieve not just Personhood, but American Personhood and, by extension, American citizenship as well.

Once Personhood becomes the law of the land, legal protections formerly reserved for the born will immediately include all fetuses/Persons, no matter from where their mothers hail.

To date, the number of fetuses who have refused to testify before congress or claim membership in a subversive group is so low as to be statistically irrelevant. Unless those reasons for deporting a U.S. citizen are amended, deportations of pregnant undocumented mothers-to-be (think of them as temporary housing for American Persons) will have to come to a halt. If you are pregnant, you stay! Sure, new law will be whipped up to reverse the status of all those fecund moms-to-be from illegal to legal, but Marco Rubio and Ted Cruz are big Personhooders so we can count on them to spearhead that. We want only best for the women who are nurturing and protecting the treasured unborn American citizens within them.

Furthermore, the fetus, unemployed and without income of its own, will of course be entitled to welfare, food stamps and the benefits of other helpful Federal programs by virtue of its American Personhood and citizenship. Practically speaking, such assistance can only be delivered to the fetus by way of its mother, the recognized caretaker of the American fetus/Person she houses. Ditto pre-natal medical supervision. That’s one of us in there! We care!

So here’s to Personhood USA. Thanks, and gracias, for all your compassionate work.

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