While I agree with the sentiment of your piece, that we need to change the way we look at public discourse, I would take a slightly different stance regarding “calling out.” I think there is a time and a place to call someone out, if it’s done properly. For example, sometimes you need to use “the R word” if someone is being genuinely racist. This may seem like an attack to the person being called out, because nobody wants to think that they are a racist. This doesn’t mean you go off on them and launch an attack, but it also doesn’t mean that we all need to be one big happy family, or that we should hold back from pointing out racism, misogyny, fascism, or any other hurtful ideology. Especially if your interlocutor isn’t open to a discussion, confrontation can be necessary if it is done with a degree of respect, if not for their views, then at least for their humanity.