June, ’17, Hotel Karnataka, Delhi
Everyone wants happiness. Everyone wants to be happy.
However everyone’s definitions for these differ. What makes me happy may not even be worth thinking about for you.
There is this context to happiness, a relativity that clouds its own definition.
And this relativity makes happiness all the more difficult to grasp i.e. both figuratively and colloquially.
That’s what makes being happy a ‘Struggle’.
I fail to understand why this should be so. Something so natural and simple an emotion need not be struggled for.
There are some who are always happy, so much so that they ensure that the world knows about it.
Always smiling, always jovial, I genuinely believe these are the most unhappy people ever. They somehow have realised that there is no point in ‘struggling’ for what is true happiness for them. And so, they mask that deep sadness with the broadest smile.
Then there are those whose happiness is tied, almost interlinked with other’s happiness. They too no longer want to struggle or seek out their own happiness. If the world around them is happy i.e. family and friends, they have chosen to call it their happiness.
And then there are the rest of us. Trying hard to make sense of ourselves and the people around us. Struggling everyday for that moment of happiness. Little moments that make us forget reality. Moments that we would love to relive again and again. But, which, somehow, seem to fade away faster than others.
I hate this ‘Struggle’ for what is truly our own.
Ask yourself: Are you Happy?
If you paused even for a moment before saying yes, you already know what it is that troubles you; what it is that is holding you back.
I’ve realised one thing, even though one must struggle for one’s happiness, the struggle can be softened, made easier, so to speak.
Know all the things that seem like a struggle to you but give you no happiness at all. Make a list of these things.
Then start removing these things from your life: one by one. Make sure to do this with a firm belief not to go back to them.
If it’s people, stay away from those that bring nothing but boredom, sadness, pain in your life. Stay away from those that pull you down.
If it’s habits, learn self control. Learn to cheat your brain with positive reinforcements for staying away from them.
Simultaneously make a list of all the things that make you happy. It can be the smallest thing or moment. That’s really not important. Just list it them down.
Now take it onto yourself to do more of these, everyday.
They say if you do something on a roll for 14 days it becomes a habit, and a good habit is worth keeping for life.
Well try it. Shoot down the sadness, plug in the happiness.
After a few days, maybe a week, you will notice a difference.
And soon, if done right, the struggle will become a breeze.
And remember, happiness is relative. So, just because you are happy now by doing a few things, does not mean they will bring happiness for perpetuity.
Those moments of sadness that creep in from time to time are important. Take a stock of them, and make sure to do the list thing again.
The greatest joys in life are not the ones you struggled and planned for and seeked out, but those that happen by chance, along the way, as a result of that Struggle.
So make that Struggle count. Who knows, you might even enjoy it.
Everyone wants to happy, everyone wants happiness….
‘Clap along if you feel like a room without a roof
Clap along if you feel like happiness is the truth
Clap along if you know what happiness is to you
Clap along if you feel like that’s what you wanna do’