A Letter to My 20 Year-Old Self, from My 60 Year-Old Self
Life is long if you know how to use it
Dear self,
Congratulations! Turning 20 is no mean feat. For most of human history, surviving two decades on Earth was a rarity. Breathe in, and feel immediately grateful for that breath.
During the next 10 years, some of the most important events of your life will take place. You may travel the world, you might start your own venture, you might meet your wife, and you might even have your first children. How much fun you will have!
I have noticed you have many questions to ask about the future of the world. Rightly so — your future is uncertain, unpredictable, and largely outside of your control.
It is only natural for you to spend your days questioning what life will be like, and to be preoccupied on what will happen. It is going to be one hell of a ride.
But here is my warning.
In your 20s you will be constantly tempted to remove your eyes from the present and look to the future. If you do, your time will not be the length you deserve.
There will come a day when you have little time left to look forward to. How will you feel about your 20s then? Already at 20 years of age, you have lived a good life. You have travelled the world, made the best of friends, and achieved great success. If your memories of the past do not satisfy you yet, what makes you think they will on your deathbed?
To borrow from the words of Seneca: the longest life is one lived in the past, present, and future.
While the future is mysterious, and the past a great story, the present is where the magic really happens. Ask questions of the present, and you will be greeted with great answers.
To remind you to do so, I have listed some questions you would do well to ask yourself from time to time. To save you the trouble, I have appended my own answers to them. I hope you find a way to keep them handy in times of need.
Why are you complaining? You have lived a better life than most.
Why are you bored? You have access to the wisdom of history’s great philosophers, scientists, writers, and leaders. Occupy yourself with their thoughts.
Why are you in pain? Pain is a temporary state of the mind evolved to stop you from hurting yourself. Learn to distrust it.
Why are you stressed? Stress is for those who are about to lose their children to disease, famine or war. Unless you go through that, stay chill.
Why are you tired? Energy is the most fundamental resource you have. Learn to channel it towards what’s most important, and you will find it abundant.
Why are you unhappy? Happiness is but a story we tell ourselves. Learn to write it.
Why are you busy? If you want your lifetime to be long and fulfilling, stop letting others take it.
Why are you rushing? You’ve got plenty of time if you know what to do with it.
Why are you idle? Again, you’ve got plenty of time if you know what to do with it.
Why are you unfit? Your body is the only asset you can influence with great confidence.
Why are you sitting? Your legs won’t last forever. Especially if you sit.
Why are you eating alone? A meal without friends is a meal wasted.
Why are you giving up? Desmond didn’t.
Why are you not excited? No good comes from keeping the energy inside you hidden from others.
Why are you so serious? Life is funny if you know where to look.
Why are you feeling stuck? Motion is relative to your frame of reference. If you can’t move, move your frame of reference instead.
Why do you fear being unsuccessful? Never chase success until you’re unafraid to lose it all. Pursue success how you played when you were five — even if you lose, the game is all that matters.
Why do you feel purposeless? Don’t expect answers, and don’t look forward to them. Pursuing this question is the most dangerous of all.
Why are you scared of death? It’s going to happen. The faster you get over it, the better.
