PinnedGraeme CareyinSlackjawI Quit Drinking Coffee And I’ve Never Felt Better, Except For When I Drank CoffeeI honestly feel bad for those who still worship at the altar of The Almighty Bean.Jun 12, 202321Jun 12, 202321
PinnedGraeme CareyinSlackjawI’m The Guy Who Stands Up As Soon As The Plane Lands, And You Slowpokes Better Be Ready To MoveYou better believe I’m gonna shoot up like a geyser as soon as the plane’s wheels kiss the tarmacMay 6, 202236May 6, 202236
PinnedGraeme CareyinSlackjawWhat To Do If You Encounter A Coyote — Namely, Longtime Ken Burns Film Narrator Peter CoyoteDo not approach or attempt to pet Peter Coyote.May 13, 202113May 13, 202113
Graeme CareyinSlackjawI’m An Oversized Pickup Truck, And This Suburban Life is Killing MeThis cul-de-sac just ain’t big enough for the likes of me7h ago57h ago5
Graeme CareyinSlackjawIt’s Crazy To Think That Everyone (Except Me) Is Going To Die SomedayDeath just isn’t for me.Sep 181Sep 181
Graeme CareyinSlackjawDid I Mention That I’m Into Jazz Now? Because I’m Super Into Jazz NowJazzMay 18, 202210May 18, 202210
Graeme CareyinSlackjawHere At Farmer Drummond’s Pumpkin Patch, We’ve Got Way Too Many Goddamn PumpkinsFor the love of God, please take as many of these unholy orange bastards off our hands as you can possibly manage.Oct 25, 20215Oct 25, 20215
Graeme CareyinSlackjawMy Guided Meditation Will Help You Achieve Enlightenment And Give You Exclusive Access To My…For just $600 a month, in addition to daily meditations, you’ll be given exclusive access to my timeshare in the Finger LakesApr 20, 2021Apr 20, 2021
Graeme CareyinSlackjawYou’ll Never Escape From My Inescapable Prison, So Please Stop TryingIn the history of this institution, no one has ever come close to escaping, though many have tried. I’m talking a lot of attempts.Mar 8, 20211Mar 8, 20211
Graeme CareyinSlackjawTry Our New 45/45/10 Burger! (Just Don’t Ask Us What’s In The 10%)To be perfectly honest, we’re not 100% sure what’s in the remaining 10%.Aug 30, 20201Aug 30, 20201