How I Stopped Trying to Do Everything and Life Is Pretty Okay
“Slow down, you crazy child”

For years, my mother had been telling me that I needed to “slow down”. My response to this suggestion was typically some derivative of, “well that’s dumb. I don’t need to slow down. Everything I’m doing are things I want to be doing, and slowing down would mean foregoing some of those things.”
Ignorance is Bliss
It was during this time that I interpreted her definition of “slowing down” to be synonymous with the conventional definition of “relaxing.” Sitting more often, doing sitting activities: watching TV, reading a book, taking a nap, knitting… ? To me, these things are also synonymous with “boring,” and simply are not things that I prioritize too highly in my daily life.
I did care to prioritize other things, though: a budding engineering career, rock climbing, cycling, baking, paper-crafting, two dozen friendships, an action-packed travel schedule, staying up to date with both the Austin Eater Heat Map and the Red River District’s show schedule, and I suppose sleeping, when necessary. I held a broad array of interests, but was far from established in any. I didn’t have time for that kind of dedication. There was so much I had yet to explore, and the thought of having to limit myself was crippling.
… Until it’s Not
I was 25 and having fun and learning a lot. But as time went by, anxiety began to surface. I felt trapped in a near-constant state of worrying about what I could or “should” be doing, instead of focusing on whatever was right in front of me at the time. I would end most days thinking, “what did I even do today?” Feeling like I had wasted more time than not. My lean towards perfectionism only fueled the fire. “At this rate, I will never amount to anything.” I was trying to do everything just for the sake of doing it, but relatively speaking, I was gaining very little. All that effort for such shallow benefit left me feeling empty, directionless, confused, and depressed. I was over it. I was ready to make a change. Maybe it was time to take Mom’s advice to heart.
By striving to build a stronger awareness in the given moment, I am allowing myself to gather more from that experience as a whole.
What I now understand my mom to have meant by “slowing down” was not necessarily to do fewer or different things, but rather, to do the things I am doing literally more slowly, with greater intent and deeper focus. By striving to build a stronger awareness in the given moment, I am allowing myself to gather more from that experience as a whole.
This commitment to mindfulness, over time, builds on itself to produce something more tangible: progress.
Sweet, coveted growth.
The only choice I make is presence. The rest is up to fate.

Nothing is more important than the current, but if it is, then it’s probably time to catch a different wave.
Learning How to Float
This mentality poses life as a series of choices. If I choose to put my body in one place and my mind in another, I am being dishonest with myself and those around me about what I truly want in that instance. But if I do my best to bring my mind with me everywhere I go, I almost always find something to be learned. And then I can feel satisfied that I have not wasted, but rather made the most of my time. Nothing is more important than the current, but if it is, then it’s probably time to catch a different wave.
By making a determined effort to practice presence, I can trust that whatever emotions an experience evokes are genuine and pure. My reactions to them are then more sincere, and my days are then much more fulfilling.
Sharing the Wealth
These suggestions may sound pretty familiar to those who practice the art of meditation. A lesser known goal of meditating goes beyond just improving how the meditator feels and into bettering the feelings of those with whom they interact. I have noticed that applying these meditation principles in my day-to-day has deeply enhanced my interpersonal relationships, as I am allowing myself to put more energy and patience into listening to people. Listening develops understanding. Understanding translates to empathy. And empathy communicates openness and acceptance, an appreciation of which manifests itself in their responses. The game of conversation catch can only blossom from there.
If you’re viewing life distinctly as a function of time, then unless my lifeline is infinite, this philosophy will ultimately enable me to do fewer things. But for now, I feel okay with exchanging some breadth for depth. I have been observing myself delving deeper into my career, my passions, and my relationships than I ever dared venture before. I have been noticing more and more moments that inspire gratitude within me. I am also just simply feeling happier. I can’t help but think that I must be doing something right.
I even walk more slowly now. I find it soothing, or dare I say, relaxing.
Thanks, Mom.
