Find the light within

As I sit here and contemplate the meaning of this post and the reason for its being, I wonder whether there is anything that I can say that will make a difference to someone, anyone. Knowing what I know and based on experiences I have had would enable me to do just that … yet for a brief second, I doubt it.

For a brief second I think about how I dare even consider taking on this task, how dare I think that I can make a difference to anyone’s life. But it is for a brief second only when the darkness shows its face, and when it touches the light, flirting with the possibility of doubt, like all flirting it has a hint of realness and opportunity. This allows for the realization that this is possible and in fact a necessity. In the words of Plato;

“You can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark, the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light”

The Monsters Are All In Your Head

You may be thinking right now; ‘Really … not that again, always the same thing … so much noise … tell me something new … or at least show me’. I hear you and I feel your pain … let us start with something a little different …

… Sound

Sound healing has been around for thousands of years and research has shown that every organ and object has its own frequency.

Your name holds the essence that is you. The sound of your name is sacred. Yet, how many times do you really say your name, or the name of others?

Try this exercise:

Write down your name: e.g. CARINA

Say it out loud like; ‘Caaaa riiiiii innnn aaaaa’.

Say it loudly … concentrating on the sound … feel the sounds on your tongue …

Stay in the moment … feel it in your throat … close your eyes …

What colours do you see? … If not colours what do you see? …

What are your feeling as you articulate these sounds? …

Stay in the moment …

Where are you feeling sensations, if any, in your body as you mouth those sounds? …

Feel the resonance within your body …

Start repeating these sounds internally, silently … where do those sounds land within your body? …

How does it feel and have you had the courage to complete this exercise in full?

If not when did you stop and what made you stop?

The judgements of our parents, of friends, of family and of society have an impact on our lives, determining whether we hide the light or shudder from the light.

Let me give you an example:

Watch a 3 year old child play — indiscriminately -

jumping …

running …

laughing …

singing …

dancing …

enjoying the moment with sheer exuberance …

free …

confident …

watching a butterfly and running to catch it …

Now watch the same child 2 or 3 years later -

the play has become more controlled …

she is quieter and less confident …

more unsure of what she should be doing and whether what she is doing is correct or not …

Already the signs of fear of judgment are insidiously sliding into her head and life …

Now look to yourself, many years after you were that 5 or 6 year old –

How are you behaving and how insidious has that slimy black fear of judgment penetrated your mind, and soul and how are you feeling because of it?

Who are those people pointing fingers at you and who are the voices shaming you to hide your light?

That 3 year old never though for an instance that hers is not the light …

never thought for an instance to hide it

As we grow up we push that light down so deeply that we forget that we are meant to shine for the greatest good of all. We allow ourselves to get bored, fall into a rut and stagnate … the body and mind growing old and useless because of this idleness. We are shamed by our light and become afraid of it, scared of what will happen if it is exposed, fearful that we will lose control and be lost forever … so we push and push at the cost of self and life … at the cost of health, both mental and physical, because we think that is the way it should be. Yet we know deep down in our soul that this is not the way it is supposed to be … so the internal conflict begins and illness begins.

The only way to stop this noise is to eat … or watch TV … or drink alcohol … or take drugs … or go on Facebook … or any other addiction you have that hides the truth.

In the words of Jung;

”People will do anything, no matter how absurd, to avoid facing their own souls”

What did you love to do as that child?

You need to embrace who you are and shine your light upon the world … your work is needed. No matter what it is — otherwise you would not be called to do it.

Listen, listen, listen ……

I am a healer and that is who I am at the core of my being. I must embrace it and stay in integrity with myself first, then with others. If I say I am going to do it, I must do it. Lack of alignment with self causes energy loss, tiredness, depression and disease. All these are found within self and the body. Our bodies are constantly talking to us — sharing with us the losses and learning. What do you need to look at to heal yourself?

STOP!

Look around you …

Look inside yourself with honest, open eyes, soulful eyes …

Continue looking …

Whatever you focus on, comes about …

All the things you don’t want to see, show up …

Look around you, take stock

If I look at my life right now, sitting on this couch, looking out at the beautiful view with its green mountains interjected with colourful trees, I yearn …

Closer to me are blooms of every colour; red, purple, white … there is rosemary, celery, parsley … all mixed together … a cacophony of colour. They are all living together on this earth, all in their own place of heaven. No one judging, staring or ridiculing the other. Each growing into their own glory, unafraid to shine their light upon the world. They merge from the earth, smiling and giving all their magnificence to us, not caring that it is small. With the giving of these gifts comes growth, and more presents and more growth until it is a big tree or plant.

This generates love to the world, and the tree feels the love for self and for others because … you, the tree, have found your place, you own your space. Only at this point will you be free. Only by sharing your light will you be free and your light will double with the sharing thereof. Like a lit candle sharing the flame with other candles … the light becomes extremely bright with the lighting of all the candles by that single candle.

Awareness is key in finding your treasure and your voice, own it.

Meditation

Breathe … IN … for 8 counts

HOLD … for 8 counts

OUT … for 8 counts

Repeat 3 times

Relax … Make you eyes soft and …

Look inside … look at your heart

What do you see?

What do you feel?

Who do you see?

What is the fear saying to you?

Its message is relevant, necessary for passing this check point

Where does it move to?

Observe … listen to the conditionings of your past and your ancestors

You deserve this time …

Breathe in … and let go of all the guilt …

No wait! …

Rather look at it … stay with it … it is really YOU in that space?

You have to allow your true self to come to the fore …

She has been shut down and forced to be quiet for too long …

Ask her to speak …

Jot down everything she is saying …

it is very quiet at first but remember ….

No judgement!

How do you know if it is your voice, your authentic voice, your light talking to you and not another cynic, or critic or judge within you?

You will feel a lightness of being, like a bubble of pure joy, a release, a knowing, a smile will cover your face without you doing anything.

Remember there is no right or wrong in this exercise. That is my experience. You may have another experience, however the lightness will remain. The acceptance will be there. It is as if you have come home eventually and nothing will ever be the same. However you are okay with it because this is the place you are meant to be … this is the place which will grow, develop and be filled with goodness, truth and abundance.

Keep a journal

Observe your progress and marvel at the beauty as the light has been given permission to shine.

Other people will see it, on an unconscious level, and you will attract all the right opportunities and people into your life. You will realize that addictions are not prevalent any more, you will move towards your most perfect self on a physical level. That chocolate cake will not entice you, your toxic friends will disappear from your life . It will feel like you are in love and you are … you are in love with life, with the universe and most of all with yourself. Remember this is not an arrogant, narcissistic love, or a co-dependent love, but a spiritual experience, where the real you is pushing through despite yourself.

Own it… you may be big or small, fat, thin, clever or dumb … anything in your opinion of self. Remember that everything is relative to who you are in your own mind, how you perceive yourself and your world. However, if you own it everything is possible.

Voices are screaming for so called perfection … weaknesses must be fixed or at least hidden before anything is possible. Really? What is perfection anyway? Someone else’s ideal? And who made that person the expert? Is that person the author of your life? Just because they took the time to write a blog or decided a trend does not make them an authority on your life or anyone else’s except their own.

You could probably say the same of me … however I am not professing to know what is right in your life and world … only supporting and guiding you to find your light within yourself, actively. That is the only way you are going to do this yourself, taking time for yourself and doing the work yourself, not vicariously through others and allowing others to define the epitome of your perfection.

For example:

The perfect photographic model (who has been photo-shopped), those perfect shoes that get thrown to the back of the cupboard, the perfect diet that destroys your health… the list is endless. Nothing is perfect, perfection is an illusion and is relative to you and your world. That is one of the things that makes life so exciting, so challenging, so sweet. So, own your so-called imperfections, traits that make you unique, you are your own incredible you.

Now it’s your turn

Find a comfortable spot, lying down works well. Just remember a blanket, it might gt cold. Breathe, and focus on your body one piece at a time from the tips of your toes to the top of your head. Asking yourself as you focus:

“What do I need to own now?” … repeat until you feel an answer floating into your mind.

What is it about yourself that you really dislike? Are you too fat, too shy, too small? Feet too small … hands too big? What is it?

Think about it, do not censor your thoughts

For some people this issue is so blatant that they will write it immediately with tears in their eyes, or fear of exposure. Others will turn the page and ignore the question, procrastinating and convincing themselves they they will do it later or can do it in their minds.

Do Not turn away … do the task.

It is necessary for a mind shift

Do it now!!

Write it in your journal along with anything that relates to it and any issues albeit that they may overwhelm you!

Perhaps it’s difficult for you to think of any weaknesses ………

You will need some time alone for this one with no disturbances but lots of tissues.

Slay the monster

You are beginning to feel your treasures rising within you in the form of ideas and notions

HOWEVER, fears will arise to sabotage your progress and attempt to keep you locked in your prison!

Plato’s cave allegory comes to mind:

Prisoners are in a cave, since childhood chained to the wall so that they cannot move their faces, necks or legs, cannot look at each other or themselves, facing a blank wall. Behind them are fires, a small wall so that the people who walk behind it cannot cast shadows.

The people are carrying puppets and they cast shadows on the blank wall!#

The prisoners think that these are real.

When a prisoner gets released, the sunlight blinds them and they want to run back into the cave. Howeve,r as their eyes adjust they realize how beautiful it is outside … the sounds … the images … and they grasp that the shadows were not reality at all.

They are experiencing the truth in the sunlight.

The free man runs back into the cave to tell everyone the good news, but is blinded by the darkness. The prisoners, thinking that the outside corrupted him and not wishing to undertake a similar journey, kill anyone who attempts to take them out of the cave.

The question is …

Do you allow your perceptions of self, others, situations and circumstances to determine your story, your treasures and the person you are?

Are you the free person or the prisoner?

YOU DECIDE

The monsters are all in your mind, either you slay them or they slay you… what will it be?

Call to Action

What are your experiences from this story? Please comment. And please clap too, thank you.