The Beginning

I want to know all about you, but not right away

You’re funny, you’re charming, I’m newly single and I’m redefining my rules

We text, then schedule, reschedule and schedule again

We meet at a bar: you order whiskey, I order wine

I’ve been sick, but I’m nervous and so I keep drinking

I smoked before I came, but it’s not helping

You’re cute, but stiff, you’re nervous too, but I don’t know it

We talk. It’s stilted. It’s awkward. This isn’t working. I want to leave.

Planning my escape, I loosen up. I make a few jokes, we laugh at your expense

I accept when you suggest we see music, you know a place down the street

I like that you know a place down the street

We go and it’s crowded and I continue to pretend I’m more confident than I am

I let you order me a drink while the band is starting

I feel self-conscious, everyone is cooler than me, even you

You hand me a drink and I relax,

I bob my head, you bob your head

I dance and then you dance and we touch and it’s nice and we’re sweaty, but it doesn’t matter

Drunkenly, we stumble to another bar, I’ve been here with my ex, but I don’t tell you

It was an awful time any way, he ignored me the whole night

I get the drinks this time and we go to the back

We find a booth and sit on the same side, I ask if you want to play Jenga, someone left it on the table

We play and you’re terrible, then we play again and I’m terrible

The blocks fall all over, I am very drunk

You look at me and we kiss and I melt

You ask if I want to go home with you, it’s our first date, but I want to, so I do

Your bed is on the floor, I’m too drunk to wonder what I’m getting into

We sleep together, once, twice, three times

It’s morning and it’s awkward and I barely know you

I don’t know how to act, I’ve never done this sort of thing

I like you, a lot, and I don’t want this to be the last time I see you

I leave, because that’s what I’m supposed to do, you don’t text, because that’s what you’re supposed to do

I check my phone endlessly, I think about you relentlessly

Then I ask if you want to hang out next weekend

You say yes, I show up, we loosen up and begin to fall in love.