3 Seconds

Yesterday I saw something… pure chaos, lights and smoke… Adrenaline rushed through my veins, filling my capillaries with chemicals. Supersaturating my veins with blood.

I couldn’t breathe. At least for a few seconds I thought I was going to die, yet time stood still all the same. Taking a breath just before the world began to spin, I found my wits and focused on the immediate: float like a moth, dodge like a bee (or something like that). Regardless, I floated, but the guy in front of me wasn’t so lucky.

3 seconds was my estimate. Just a 3 second shift in time and it would have been me.

So here I am now, chaos in my rear view… I should be dead.

The last few weeks had been rough. Lately I can’t tell who I am. Perhaps I just ever thought I would be this person: an adult. I’ll go from sad to mad and think these horrible thoughts I don’t want to be my own. Hopefully I’ll live long enough to see them die and forget they ever existed. For now I feel both lucky and blessed to be alive.

Life was never guaranteed to be easy. Karma just doesn’t work that way. Life has to wane and wax to feel complete. That is why rich kids in the suburbs decide to try dope. Because why not?

I don’t know what type of person was in the car in front of me, or the the dude that hit him for that matter. I just kept driving. I am pretty sure there is a thing called the bystander effect, where people who witness something bad happen assume the other people around them call into the police rather than take action themselves. Well that was me, a clear example of the bystander effect: I just kept driving.

There was this story in the news the other day about a boy that fell down a flight of stairs during a frat party. The kid hit his head so bad that he had brain damage, but no one at the party called the police until maybe six hours later. He ended up dying and his parents are suing the school for negligence, or something like that.

Life is crazy like that, one minute you’re here and the next you are a snowflake melting at the end of spring.

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