Dreams n Such

Just like that, everything changed. It’s as if the tides of my life are shifting through their seasons. But I am scared because the sea never comes back the same as when it left.

I keep having this dream where I’m in a neighborhood that feels like it is mine, but it only exists in my head and I know I’ve never actually been there before. When I walk up to the door of a house I assume is mine, I find it locked, so I break in through the window. Then I wake up.

There are some obvious things in my life that have brought me to this vision but I can’t help but wonder why I have this dream over and over again. Usually that means the universe is trying to tell me something.

My brother recently brought up the idea of buying our dad’s farmhouse off of him, but I am not in any type of financial situation to start investing in property.

The part of the dream that’s been eating away at me is where I break in through the window. I like to think of myself as a good person. I don’t steal or lie, I don’t cheat or manipulate folks. So the fact that I so gracefully slip into a house that isn’t mine keeps eating at me.

There was a time in my life when these bad feelings would manifest, a series of events that taught me how to “trust my gut”. I would get a hunch something was going to happen or dream about someone’s uncle I met once, only to find out they passed away.

When you open yourself up to the universe, it will start talking- like an Italian family at Christmas dinner. The challenge is to listen, with your heart, your senses, and your gut… especially your gut.

Tomorrow I will wake up a different person and the day after that until I finally don’t wake up. That is the story I want to write, one that is constantly evolving into something greater. For too long I was stagnant, letting life throw me in each direction without any acknowledgement of me allowing it to happen. That’s not the kind of life I want to live anymore.

These days I am more honest with myself about my emotions and try to recognize that my reactions, especially to difficulties, need to be reasonable, factual, and logical…

So when things like this reoccurring dream keep popping up, I tend to take notice. Mostly because it is not reasonable or logical, obviously not factual.

Damn it if I don’t end up breaking into someone’s window today thinking it’s my own. So it goes.

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