Do Your Biases Towards Certain Groups Make You a Racist?
I love “gotcha” stories.
When the hot mic picks up the racist, sexist, homophobic mindset lurking underneath the façade of the seemingly egalitarian football coach, entertainer, or member of congress, I feel elated. Finally, another phony has been outed!
Los Angeles City Councilwoman Nury Martinez got busted recently thanks to a leaked conversation of an October 2021 meeting with two other council members. During the meeting, she referred to the Black son of a white council member as a “changuito” (Spanish for “little monkey”).
At first, she issued a public apology and gave up her council president position but remained on the city council. In the following days, outraged citizens marched on City Hall, demanding her resignation. Even President Biden weighed in, calling the remarks of Martinez and two other council members “appalling.” She resigned a few days later.
I was itching to write about this incident, having been born and raised in Los Angeles. But as I thought about what Martinez said when she thought no one but her inside circle was listening, I found myself examining my own racism and biases.
Having a typically unjustified run-in with the police is part of the Black experience in America. For some, it means spending time in jail after being convicted of an alleged crime, prosecuted with sketchy evidence. Others end up brutally beaten or killed.
On April 29, 1992, I visited a former college professor in Los Angeles. Live on the TV in his classroom, a judge announced the jury’s decision to acquit the four white Los Angeles Police Department officers who were caught on videotape beating and kicking Rodney King as he lay, helpless and unarmed, on the ground.
As I watched the not-guilty verdict, I felt like I had been kicked in my stomach. The ruling represented a dismissal of my rights. In that courtroom, Black people were being told that as far as the all-white jury was concerned, our lives didn’t matter.
I had always felt the police were not to be trusted. The verdict and the riots that erupted in response to the jury’s decision deepened my resentment toward law enforcement officials.
Then I examined, with some discomfort, my own narrow-minded viewpoints. Like the way I assume white people with Southern accents are racists. And ignorant. Or my tendency to look down on those without college degrees. And the disdain I feel for people who don’t have books in their homes.
How often have we had conversations with like-minded friends, making jokes about the people we condescend to? Those whose political viewpoints are on the opposite side of ours. People whose ancestors belong to the group that oppressed your people. It’s an entertaining and comforting pastime, talking about how they’re all morons and we’re such great people because we belong to a superior class of do-gooders and thinkers.
Always thinking about being the change I want to see, I thought about something I read in “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz. The first agreement is “Be Impeccable with Your Word.”
He’s not talking about following through with a promise. It means being mindful of the words you say and think to yourself, about yourself, and others. He writes that praising yourself is a good idea instead of being this tyrannical judge beating yourself up for not being perfect. And this idea extends to other human beings. Being impeccable with your word means releasing judgment and resentment about something someone did to you ten days or ten years ago.
Letting go of bitterness requires practice. But it can lead to a healthier and happier life.
Addressing our long-held racism, our biases that place an entire group of people on a list of offenders and thinking about how you would feel if someone called you a dim-witted snob, are baby steps toward creating an environment — be it within our families, our communities, and even the world — where we can begin to improve the quality of our lives.
The change begins within. When we try to acknowledge and respect our shared humanity.
