Justin Bieber

How he *almost* changed one 13 year old’s life forever.

almost famous.

What’s worse than a prepubescent teen with an attitude problem and terrible acne? A prepubescent teen with a burning passion to meet Justin Bieber.

Justin Bieber — world peace advocate

Justin Bieber. The messiah of bad pop music and an infinite flow of hair that will let any comb glide through it with ease. He can capture any girls heart under the age of 14 with just one look and a bite of a lip. And luckily, the summer going into freshman year of high school my life *almost* changed forever.

Before I get too into this story, I need the reader to know that there is no happy ending. This is my life. And life never turns out quite how you would expect it. But maybe that’s the beauty of it all. If I met Justin Bieber, maybe I would be on world tour and not in this English class at all. Oh, in a parallel universe how things would be different.

At the age of 13, with a bad spray tan and camera with video recording capabilities I embarked in a three day journey to make a video in hopes of meeting my idol, Justin Bieber. The rules of the contest were to make a video promoting Justin Bieber’s new song “One Time.” Being 13, we didn't have much of a budget for the video so we put signs on people’s cars and held signs with strangers. Two 13 year old girls, asking strange men to hold a sign with Justin Bieber’s name on it. We really thought this was the moment that would change our lives forever.

So anyway, after all was said and done and the video was posted to the world through the fascinating medium of YouTube, the views started rolling in. Not only did views come quickly, comments with helpful feedback and degrading comments were also provided. Comments such as “blonde girl is supa ugly” managed to get 30 thumbs up. 30 thumbs up. 30 different people thought to themselves “so true.” Thank you for the contribution to my self esteem at such a young age. How beautiful the trolls of the internet can be.

Fast forward to a few years later. I had just moved to a new high school in Georgia and never did I think that my haunting past would come up in conversation. We were sitting in class and I hear the song “One Time” playing from someone’s iPhone. I looked around and vividly remembered thinking “There is no way.” No way would anyone find that video of me, right? WROOONGGGGGGGGG. A few minutes later everyone was looking at me and laughing. My teacher even suggested to put it on the big screen. (Note: This was my second chance at almost being famous but I kindly declined my opportunity to appear on the big screen.) This kind of sounds like bullying, but the truth of the matter is everything is determined by the way you can handle a situation. I laughed of course, probably turned bright red. But most importantly, I gave the middle finger to my haters and embraced it.

This was my chance at being famous. If I had won that competition, I wouldn't have been in class with those haters. I would be drinking champagne on a private island and getting arrested for racing luxury cars in Miami. That is how my life would be different if Justin Bieber chose me as his winner. I would be one less lonely girl. I would be his wife and we would do totally normal things together such as getting matching tattoos showcasing our love for each other. He would be into a prepubescent teen with lengthy legs and bad personal hygiene in my parallel universe.

So maybe my life is a joke, and maybe a comedian could really make some money off of making fun of my past. But how far can a comedian go for a joke? Where does a comedian cross the line? Is making fun of a 13 year old white girl for being in love with Justin Bieber “politically correct?”

The answer to all of those rhetorical questions is, mehhhhhh. More or less. Mas or menos. Essentially. Roughly. In a ball park figure.

Basically what I am trying to say is, that there are no right or wrong answer here. There is no physical line that can be crossed but there is a point in time where someone can say too far is too far. And what my essays really tunes in on, is who or what is the deciding factor.

In my essay exploring Tina Fey’s role as Sarah Palin and my essay annotating DL Hughley’s stand up routine both include an underlying theme of politics and the effects they can have on the American people. Both comedians use public events in order to portray an idea, while representing the truth behind the curtains.

Throughout my work, you will see how I analyze the ideas presented and work through the research to find what the comedians are trying to voice. Both Tina Fey and DL Hughley look at the bigger picture. Tina Fey represents the flaws in the election process, while DL Hughley looks at the flaws in racism in society and how politics plays a huge rule in that. Both comedians stand as a representation of how politics is present in our entertainment business and how comedians are able to tune into the problems while bringing awareness in a playful way. By the end of my portfolio, my expectation for the reader is to understand where the line is drawn that determines what is politically correct or incorrect and why it is important for us to understand.

Oh, and enjoy (: