I saw a Throw Back Thursday picture on Facebook. It was of a guy about 12 or 13 years old with longish hair sitting by his drum set. I don’t know the guys age but it easily could have been taken circa 1968 or 69 when I was that age. It reminded me of that summerand how I learned that guys can be as cute as puppies, but unlike puppies, they can also be real dicks.
It was the whole summer love cliche. We held hands, went swimming, went to movies, listened to music and we made out. Making out might have been our primary activity. I so want to go off on a tangent and muse about why we called french kissing making out but then we’d have to get into the whole French thing and we’d never find our way. Lets just say, there was a reason Chap Stick was invented. So there I was, long hair parted in the middle, Coppertone suntan and I had a boyfriend. Life was good.
To be honest, I wasn’t in love with the puppy. He was cute. He was fun. He was cuddly. He was the perfect puppy. Then sometime in August he broke up with me. I don’t remember being really hurt by it. I still had my gang. And I wasn’t devastated that he broke up with me so he could be with one of my friends. The I need ice cream because I’m so depressed about a break up happened later in my life. So what was my Guys Are Dicks 101 course about?
It actually was about her, the other woman. She was only a girl but other girl sounds way too silly, even for me. What she told me was that he said to her “I’m glad I broke up with Carol but I wish you could learn to kiss like her.” So you’re all nodding in agreement right? The guy was a dick. I have no idea what happened to Mr Dick For Brains. Maybe like a puppy who chews everything he sees, the guy grew out of it. I on the other hand not only learned about guys but I learned that my lips had a super power all their own!
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