March 12 

just one day in my history

what am I doing with my life? everyday going to the same place, turn on my computer, start my day, drink some tea, browse some websites, make some calls, type something, and that’s it.

it’s been a while, i try to escape it somehow but still keep coming back to it.

what am i gonna be in the next 5 years? 7 years? 10 years?

marriage is not on top of the list. it’s somewhere in the middle and actually i am not sure if it’s on the list.

btw, writing on this blog feels like typing on a typewriter, which has not been apparent for so long.

all i have to do is learning to love myself again and learning everything again. i wanna start a fresh relationship and connection, yeah, with myself, who i have not really been connected for a while. i know you are somewhere, i know you are gonna come back. i just have to work it out, work everything and every way out, and you are gonna be there again, in my life, smiling back at me.

laptop is gonna die soon. from now on im gonna write you every night, even if there is nothing there to write.. im gonna write to you, for you, my dear self ☺