16 Thoughts from the Mind of an Age-Grouper with a Full-Time Job
The pro triathlete narrative on social media is typically that of stunning and hardcore photos of training to win, reviews of enviable gear and food (but never bacon …), and thrilling videos of competing all over the world.
I eat that shit up the same way I’d eat up some bacon right now if I only had my bacon sponsor. Pro threads are inspiring, entertaining, and beautiful.
However, because I remain but a lowly age grouper who trains sporadically and doesn’t usually win, holds a full-time office job, eats too much peanut butter, and has no sponsors, my road to the finish line is only mildly entertaining (as evidenced by my nine whole followers) and sometimes downright ugly.
Nonetheless, I forged ahead with compiling a few of my thoughts from recent days to share with you select few:
There is no single feat more impossible than getting a sports bra on in a rush when you’re still damp after lap swim. My lunch break is over in TWO minutes!
Ladies’ night on a Wednesday night?? Dude, bedtime is 8 p.m.
Between January swim classes and work meetings, it looks like my only choice today is 9 p.m. lap swim. But bedtime … is … sigh.
We’ve reached the end of Netflix, and we still have 90 minutes left on the trainer …
… now we have 88 minutes left on the trainer.
How unbelievable (in both senses of the word) would it be if I actually got a bacon sponsor out of this thing?
Wow, the bike room/spare bedroom smells awesome!*
I can totally make wearing running clothes under my work clothes look passably professional.
When was the last time my quads weren’t tired? And why is the office coffee pot on the second floor?
I’m going to have to spread these race entry fees out over at least four pay periods.
Pizza was a bad choice.
Do the other people in the gym notice that my sweat smells like chlorine?
Continue to resist the temptation to write about saddle sores in your blog, Casey.
Keys, wallet, phone … and if I wear my glasses to work today so I don’t rot my eyeballs out on my lunch swim, I need to pack contacts so I don’t get vertigo on the treadmill** after work. Also, lunch. Also, snacks. Probably second breakfast ...
*I’ve never had this thought.
**Every time I manage to run on the treadmill for 45 minutes without stopping or tripping, I feel as proud as I imagine OK Go is for this:
I can’t believe you made it all the way to the end! I’d like to thank you for reading and invite you to recommend anything you like, follow this blog, and send bacon sponsor leads (or just packages of bacon) my way.
