It seems as though you're trying to draw lines from the addictions or mental illnesses of the men you fell for and their unfulfilled potential. While that may well have been the reason for each of them, there are successful, fulfilled people out there with bipolar disorder or anxiety. There are successful, fulfilled people who still count each and every day sober. Addiction and mental illness do not eliminate the possibility of fulfilling your potential, just as people without mental illness or addiction can remain in the "has potential" category their whole life. I hope you (and anyone else reading this) understand that. There is more than enough stigma against mental illness as is.