“I Wonder If He Knew He Was Going to Die”

(tc:Lisa, Originally posted on Facebook)

How can I stand for this?

I can’t.

Actually, THIS is what sitting is standing against.

I am forced to think about the moments before untimely death.

The thoughts that may have crossed his mind and might cross mine.

A mind ready to lay down the burden of the day, of the life.

A mind anticipating home

family

kids

couch

These are a few of the thoughts I imagine crossed his mind, and would cross mine, before the end.

  • “I was so close to home, i’ve just about had it with this car”
  • “let me see if i can get some assistance”
  • “maybe this police officer can help me, maybe not”
  • “why is her tone of voice so hostile?”
  • “I know how this could go…Lord help me”
  • “Am I going to die on this asphalt?”
  • “Can a brotha just get a tow?”
  • “Hell naw, I ain’t got time for this mess”
  • “Really? Y’all’s guns are drawn?”
  • “Am I going to die on this asphalt?”
  • “Ima just put my hands up. I need to make it out of this craziness alive”
  • “Let me walk very slow.”
  • “T, remember, no sudden movements! I know you are pissed and tired, but stay chill”
  • “Where did all these other cops come from? Why so many? Is that a chopper?”
  • “Am I going to die on this asphalt?”
  • “Let me get back in my car and wait for some actual help”
  • “This can’t be happening to me”
  • “So that is what a Taser feels like?!”
  • “OH SH*T, I just got shot”
  • “Am I going to die on this asphalt?”
  • “Am I going to die on this asphalt?”
  • “Am I going to die on this….?”
  • “Am I going to die….?”
  • “Am I going………………………

#terencecrutcher