True Confessions:

The Marriage Feast at Cana

(God’s Blessings in my Life, part 4)

I rode over clouds like a rodeo and saw myself at a place familiar only in the Bible stories I had read. I saw houses made of bricks of clay, the rocky roads, the man under a sycamore tree, the children running after one another, the paved road with cobbled stones, the dust in the air caused by the desert wind, the shore (of Galilee?), the fishermen with big baskets filled with fishes on their shoulders.

I saw myself inside a home, its door was only a sort of fabric which held the sun’s heat out. I saw the welcome of guests at the door, the embrace of the host, the embrace of the host’s wife, the servants, and the guests bowing and leading me inside.

There was a kitchen with a large stove made of bricks, the servants were busy with the wheat or dough in the basket; they were cooking. I saw Mama Mary at the kitchen. She embraced me and led me to where Jesus would sit. I saw a line of big earthen jars near the stove.

While passing by the balcony, I heard music, the sound of tambourines and wooden wind instruments, and peals of laughter, and saw people dancing in the streets. The parade of merry-makers was leading to the home where I was in.

As Mama Mary led me to the banquet hall, I saw the bride and the groom. I sat with them on the floor, Mama Mary sat beside me. I saw Jesus and His disciples entered and also sat on the floor. Jesus looked at me with questioning eyes. I clearly saw His face smiling as if He truly knew me.

There was music again. It was time for the couple to dance. Jesus did not stand. So I sat between Him and Mama Mary. Then, with trembling words I looked at Jesus and whispered, “Heal my wife!” I cried a lot onto the Lord’s breast. He hugged me while Mama Mary tried to console me. The disciples looked at me with pity and all laid their hands upon me. The couple stopped dancing. The music stopped. There was a deafening silence in the room. I whimpered like a little child. The couple and the guests looked at me. I did not stop crying.

The curtain at the door opened. I saw the silhouette of my wife. Jesus carried me like a child, headed to the door and put me down, and embraced my wife. All were looking at me. I bade farewell as my wife and I stepped onto the stairs. They waved goodbye with the assurance that ALL of them will heal my wife. Christine and I went home together. I saw myself at the gate of our home.

INSIGHTS:

This was the last day of my journey into solitude. This was only a spiritual exercise I did not expect to happen. I poured all my feelings, all my fears, my sorrows, my anxiety of losing someone I hold dear in life, all that was me. I woke up and found myself with my head on the wooden table at the retreat house. There was a pool of tears on the table. I found myself back in my time, and just in time for the lunch break.

I wondered why the names of the couple at the Marriage Feast at Cana were withheld. I wondered why Jesus made His first miracle there, at an untimely time, but in a happy home. I was sure the couple represented all married brides and grooms. If only couples would invite the presence of Jesus (and Mama Mary) in their married life, surely it would be a marriage made in heaven.

Lastly, I learned that when one asks from a heart filled with love, it is not only Jesus and Mama Mary who answer prayers — it is all of them in heaven.