Make a normal human behavior taboo.
Sumant Manne

Thank you for taking the time to respond to my piece. I wanted to respond to your comment, because I think it is part of the values of civilized men and women Lyndall Gordon evokes that we talk to each other and try to understand each others’ perspectives. I hope the piece made clear that I do not equate what I call “toxic masculinity” with masculinity; so many of those positive qualities I describe are valuable and necessary — not for serving women, but in service of all humanity. Watching my son play rugby, I see the intensity of his bond with his team, watch his healthy competitive desire to win, and see him honour his opponents afterwards in an intensely masculine environment of fathers and sons and feel nothing but respect and admiration. Femininity as well as masculinity can be toxic; we all have both inside of us to a greater or lesser extent. I hope this helps to clarify my views.