I Don’t Know
Sometimes, i think about dying, i don’t mean to kill myself because the fact is i don’t want to die, at all.
I want to live my life, i want to run away, there are a lot of things i want to do and i want to see. Just like what Sylvia Plath said on her book, The Unabridged Journals of Sylvia Plath,
“I can never read all the books I want, I can never be all the people I want and live all the lives I want. I can never train myself in all the skills I want. And why do I want? I want to live and feel all the shades, tones and variations of mental and physical experience possible in my life. And I am horribly limited.”
I am horribly limited, i feel trapped in my own life, i can go on and tell you all the stuff i want to do but unfortunately, i’m still here doing nothing, wasting every second i have until i stop breathing while I should be out there living my life, doing all the stuff i want to do.
I don’t know.
I don’t know what i’m doing with my life, but one thing for sure, this is not what i want and i don’t know how to get out.