Finishing Thoughts: Hellblade: Senua’s Sacrifice

An intense, unrelenting exploration of mental health portrayed as a terrifying journey to hell…

Hellblade came highly recommended, and I didn’t know much about it when I started. I think I was expecting some sort of walking-sim-esque, story and narrative based game, and I was part-correct and part-very, very wrong.

“Mentally exhausting” is how a gaming friend of mine described this game, and she is spot on. Playing this game was literally an ordeal. Primary an emotional/mental one. I wanted to complete it, but I really wanted it to be over, and I almost began to dread firing it up each evening, as I knew I was in for a heavy, unrelenting onslaught of my mind and senses, that I don’t think was ultimately enjoyable.

I can see why this game is so well reviewed. It does what it does to perfection. It is, as far as I can tell, an exploration into mental illness, in that your character is going through some serious psychological turmoil, trying to come to terms with the death of a lover and her mother, and the trauma imposed on her by her father. The whole mental journey is played out in the guise of a pilgrimage to hell, facing off against evil in its various forms — bosses, baddies, darkness, failure, disease, injury, trickery & illusion etc (EDIT — see end of this page for an update on this interpretation). The developers throw every mechanic they can at you to convey the destructive and uncontrollable nature of depression and mental illness, and so the result is a game that is genuinely traumatic to play. Witnessing your character go through endless challenges, pain, semi-deaths, screaming, confusion etc, minute after minute, hour after hour, is why this game was an ordeal to play.

It was all immaculately delivered. The dialogue is excellent, the acting is superb, the Norse mythological world is convincing and terrifying in equal measure. The pain your character experiences feels authentic, and this game has definitely left its mark — I won’t be forgetting the experience in a hurry.

I wasn’t entirely convinced about the combat. It was well done for sure — timing/parry-based 1-on-1 and then 1-on-groups, where even two mis-judged dodges will kill you. But, there was this feeling I couldn’t shake that this game shouldn’t have any combat at all. I can’t quite explain why. It fits — you are fighting battles in your mind so what better metaphor than for physical opponents you have to defeat, but I found the non-physical enemies in the game far more scary and meaningful. The waves of sword-fodder enemies just seemed slightly like padding, but on the flip-side they did add to the sense of endless tension in the game, and that feeling that you are never really safe. I think generally I just don’t like that sort of combat, so it could just be a personal thing.

So my overall impression…. Aaandd I don’t know. I’m conflicted. The game wasn’t bad, but possibly the opposite… it was almost too good. It conveyed mental trauma so well that I did not find it ‘enjoyable’ to play. And I am sure that was the intention — this game does not try, in any way, to create a ‘fun’ experience — and rightly so. But, I wasn’t ready for a deep dive into mental illness and it was just too intense for me. These are conflicting emotions, and I don’t know how I ultimately feel about my experience with this game. It was really hard work to play, but I’m pleased I completed it, and I can’t think of any other game that conveys this sort of message in such a hard-hitting and impactful way.

I suppose, this was a great game, I just wasn’t ready for it.

EDIT

Since writing this, I watched the making-of featurette included in the game, found online here. It is a fascinating insight into the care, thought and attention to detail the developers undertook to create this game.

Through watching this I came to realise something significant which warrants mentioning here. The depiction of Senua’s journey to hell is not a metaphor or a ‘representation’ of her mental illness as I had assumed; it is in fact closer to showing her actual experienced reality, as a result of her psychosis. For people with psychosis, these sorts of experiences are real, and as such it makes the game even more powerful, given it is rooted in real studies and input from educators and sufferers alike.

This game feels less like a game and more like an interactive educational document for those studying psychology. The fact it happens to be in a medium commonly described as a game, and therefore sits on the virtual storefront alongside every other more traditional game, perhaps undersells what this game actually is, and the value it can provide.