terrifying beauty of following your dreams

The terrifying beauty of following your dreams, not sure if you should hold on for the ride or opt out cuz its too scary. And yet, this is what you’ve dreamed of. For as long as I can remember I have had story ideas in my head. Some were a gentle mist that evaporated as soon as another thought made an appearance. Others still come barging into my current stream of thought years later.

For half of my life I contemplated becoming a writer. Several years later I have a million partial stories, a couple completed stories, two heart wrenching poems, three completed plays, and several finished and unfinished skits. And this year I decided was the year I was going to take my writing seriously.

My heart skips a beat…… “ummm. If you do that, people are going to read it.” “Yes. Isn’t that the point?” “Do you really want people to read your stuff?” “People already have, they said it was great! They even said they can’t wait til it’s in theaters.” “Yes, but do you really want your soul exposed for all the world to see?” “YES!!! It will be exciting! It will be an adventure!!! It will b…” “Scary. Very very scary.” “But it might be fun!!” This is the internal conversation I’ve had for years.

This year marks a first for me, it is the first time in my life I have only had to have one job. The first time I have had a lot of spare time to devote to ideas, and flushing them out. I don’t have a million schedules to balance and a crazy number of people who are demanding a piece of my time. And to keep the boredom at bay…I’ve had to find other things to do.

This year marks a new beginning for me. A time to define who I really want to be, and crazy enough…I want to be a writer. I have stories in me needing to come out. Stories other people need to read. So, with fear and trepidation, I am starting my journey. There are dreams to pursue, mountains to conquer, desserts to cross, but at the end of the day, I have decided I need to do this for me, to prove I can.

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