My name is Travarious and I am 16 years old. My life has been very eventful. From being abused since I was around 6 years old, I had slowly become a coward. I had slowly become someone who looked at their past and wonders “where did it all go wrong?” And to be honest my answer was “Everywhere”. But things have gotten better over the past 2½ months.
On November 28th 2016, my mom was arrested and charged with Child Abuse, a Class A misdemeanor, and she’ll get a max of 1 year in jail. Bullshit I know, but it is what it is. You don’t always get to deal someone the hand you want to deal them. There’s no point in dwelling over stuff like that. On the same day I was placed in CPS’ care and put in an emergency shelter. Being there I met my brothers. They’re not genetically my brothers but I see them as family and if they need anything that’s how I’m gonna treat them. And now I’m in a foster home and everything is going well for the most part.
Last night I dreamt of something I had no control over. Something was happening to me. I was being chased by my mother through an abandoned city. I was running and so was she. But then I remembered something someone close told me. I stopped running and I faced her. I looked her in her eyes and told her, “I can’t run from you anymore. I mean, I could run from you my whole life but it’s not worth it.” She couldn’t look at me. She disappeared into ash, blown away by the wind. It didn’t take long to understand what my mind was trying to tell me.
You miss out on life quite a bit when you spend so much of it running away from the past. Life implies death. Love implies hate. I can’t live my life afraid anymore because my entire life is waiting for me. Our lives are waiting for us to come out of our shell and do something. Maybe the adventure is something in the woods or maybe it’s with that guy/girl you keep smirking at in your classes. Maybe it’s in a computer. Maybe it’s showing the world your passion. Why not be you be the one who starts your adventure? To those who are afraid I say stop being so scared. Stop distracting yourself from your issues. “But Trav, it’s not that simple” you might say. And to you I’d tell “You think I don’t know that? You keep working towards being fearless. It doesn’t happen overnight. Carelessness is what happens overnight. You keep working toward being fearless a little bit every day and someday you truly will be.” You can learn a positive lesson from a negative experience, and vice versa. It’s all up to you at the end of the day.
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