I’m right, you’re wrong.

I’m right. You’re wrong. You’re right. I’m wrong.

Chad McFarland
Sep 6, 2018 · 2 min read

I remember in history class a teacher once said, “we learn about history so we know what not to repeat”. And yet, here we are. I’m no history expert, but I recall learning about race wars, race riots, separate water fountains, bathrooms and swimming pools. I’ve heard about Rosa Parks staying seated on a bus and refusing to move because, “that’s how it’s supposed to be”.

While we don’t have separate water fountains, buses or swimming pools today, the divide between race and political parties is approaching a staggering distance. There is little argument that we have advanced far beyond where we were 50 years ago. And there is little argument that we are living in the greatest era of this country. The possibilities and opportunities are nearly endless.

Yet here we stand and kneel today, taking giant steps backward in the name of “I’m right, you’re wrong”. It’s disgusting really, to think that my interpretation of a passage in the bible or the constitution would ultimately mean that someone else is entirely in the wrong. In turn, I suppose someone else’s interpretation of a passage from their religious book of choice and governing document would ultimately mean that I am wrong as well. The cycle continues. In my 14 years as an educator working with at-risk youth, I’ve learned many things. But THE most important skill I developed was the ability to put myself in someone else’s shoes. It’s called empathy and it doesn’t always come easily. In order to be empathetic, we must be able to overcome our own biases, prejudices, judgments, backgrounds and egos. And our biases, prejudices, judgments, backgrounds and egos aren’t things we are born with. These things are developed over time and are derived from our friends, family members, experiences and environments, which means they are learned. And that also means they can be unlearned.

Today’s divisions have not been caused by facts, but rather by perceptions. They are caused by our unwillingness to hear at least one other person’s point of view and accept that as their reality. Just because you or I have not been oppressed or I haven’t lost a loved one serving our country, doesn’t mean someone else hasn’t had those experiences and therefore, adopted that reality. So if our behaviors, actions, backgrounds, judgments, prejudices and biases are learned behaviors, it is high time we do some unlearning and begin closing the great divide.

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