The Essays that got me into Stanford University (+ advice)
CommonApp personal statement and Stanford essays
Big Anti-Plagiarism Disclaimer (just read it)
Don’t do it — it’s just a crappy idea because 1) it never works (and even if it did, the whole app process is to connect you with a school you’ll be a good fit with, so not being honest will probably not do you any favors) and 2) if you’re that unconfident in your own work, your problem isn’t skill in writing an essay. Have a little faith in yourself, and a piece of writing that is truly you will shine SO much brighter than one you’ve assumed. Trust me. That said, I hope these example essays are helpful. I decided to put them out there as an example of how one student drew a picture of themselves for a university, but how you do that is 100% unique to you. Let me know if you have any questions about the essay process though and I’ll do my best to help out :) PS remember that these essays got me accepted to Stanford, but also rejected from a lot of universities and colleges. A LOT. Very many grains of salt here, every school is different.
Your weekly book rec…
The Black Flamingo by Dean Atta. I just finished this, and it’s a powerful story about a gay, mixed race guy growing up in London and feeling like he never quite fits in with any of his identities — Greek Cypriot, Jamaican, LGBT, etc. That is, until college, when he joins a drag society which gives him the confidence and community that helps him to embrace the identities he never felt like he could claim before. It’s a really powerful take on intersectionality, on that feeling of being suspended between multiple worlds, and the genuine experiences of life and how art combats that. It’s written in verse, which I found really out of the box, and is interspersed with timely poems that he wrote at different stages of his life. It’s a really good read, and not a long one, and I would highly recommend it.
CommonApp Personal Statement Essay
For those of you who don’t know, this essay is the CommonApp one that you write that goes out to all the colleges you apply to through that platform.
Some students have a background, identity, interest, or talent that is so meaningful they believe their application would be incomplete without it. If this sounds like you, then please share your story.
When I was younger, I aspired to be rich so I could own an enormous library. I imagined the sense of self-worth and pride that would accompany gazing at floor-to-ceiling sturdy, oak shelves almost bursting under the weight of beautiful volumes in various languages. As a child, complete success and ownership of what you love feels completely plausible, a dream only kept from you by the restrictions of time.
The only difference I saw at that time between poor and rich was the public library users and the library owners. The only thing keeping me from the latter was the barrier of age and motivation, which I was sure I could overcome by harnessing knowledge under my fist and using it to attain anything I wanted. I continued to hold this view while I was homeschooled, but when I began to attend a private high school, I realized that the difference between basic economic security and the lack thereof was much more complex.
In the past three years I have come to see that not only are my peers unlike myself, but they do not know that there is a difference between us. No one understands the concept of economic insecurity if they have never had to give up their summers and afternoons after school to work to help with bills, if they have never had to pay for their own expenses and textbooks, if they complain about having dinner with their parents, never having experienced a time when their parents were at work before breakfast and back after their bedtimes. The only other people my age I have encountered who truly understood this were those whose knowledge was also founded on personal experience.
But the worst part about this lack of awareness is the fact that I consider myself to be very privileged. Certainly, I have to work, but I also go to a private school. I can’t afford the to get my driver’s license like the others in my class, but I own a smartphone. The issue is not that most of the people at my high school don’t see me, it’s that they don’t see anyone who is worse off — those who can’t afford to go to school, who have to work longer hours than me, who are separated from their parents at the border — they don’t see any of those people, not really. Even amongst the most politically liberal, there seems to be an underlying current of fear and denial that prevents the most basic empathy. This has led me to the question: Why?
All my life, the process of buying books has been inherently thoughtful. It involves exploring used bookstores, carefully considering and handling every book before buying it. I choose the books that I own carefully because I have to. Even after I buy the book, I read it with appreciation, and then retire it to a shelf which is not a symbol of my money, but a road map of my true thoughts and interests. I value my books more than anything else because of the thought they provoke.
From this, I have learned what the people who can stock their shelves full of new, leather-bound books don’t: thoughtful awareness. That’s what separates me from my schoolmates. No matter their political identity, people don’t often think about issues that seem distant from them, if for no other reason than they don’t have to. Because of the perspective my economic circumstances have given me, I actively engage with new ideas and perspectives in order to avoid making the same mistakes as those around me which might cause someone’s knowledge or needs to be overlooked due to their personal circumstances. I think and I act.
I have come to understand that the rich people I envied as a child might have enormous libraries, but they certainly don’t have them to read the books.
What I noticed about this essay is it’s good to have a balance of quirky specific things about you and your interests (I am a huge bookworm and this is a truth universally acknowledged) and applicable interests of yours that you might engage to inspire change. Here’s my (very over-simplified) concept: school wants student that will fit well with school so student will be cool and change the world for the better and ultimately people will go wow and give school money. So show something you’re passionate about and delve deep into how your mind works, without getting too out of the bounds of relatability. Also remember that there’s no way you can share EVERYTHING meaningful to you so write a little picture into your life, not portfolio-summary-10-point-manifesto of your hopes, dreams, and interests.
I also found it super helpful to write several essays on vastly different topics and then choose the one I liked best. It’s good to run them by someone to see if they think it really captures who you are, too.
Stanford-specific short questions
Most significant challenge society faces
There is a loss of imagination resulting in the lessening of both individuality and empathy. People rarely take the time to introspect and consider what makes them distinct and why they ought to own that, and at the same time they fail to consider how others also have unique value.
Connection between essays/responses really helps bring the ‘picture’ of you that the admission officer sees together. This response connects to a theme in my app of the importance of equal opportunity and giving voice to different perspectives.
Last two summers
Working half-time (2018) and full-time (2019) at the Dry Eye Company (my mum’s business) to fund school and save for college; Taking two classes (English Composition, English Literature) at Olympic College (local community college); Taking Driver’s Ed; Reading books (particularly Classics, Russian Literature); Writing (prose, poetry, and social commentary)
Not much to say about this, I really maxed on the space by condensing points as much as possible.
Historical moment or event
Yiannis Ritsos writing poetry from inside the Greek prison camp. I want to understand whether he did it for himself to get through the experience or to rebel against lack of free speech.
Again, connections are key — this goes back to Greek heritage mentioned in my ‘additional information’ section, to my interest in Classics specified elsewhere in the app, and my personal love of the intersection of poetry and activism.
What five words best describe you?
Intellectual, genuine, self-actualized, determined, stalwart
I know a lot of people who got more creative with this and used their five words to form a quirky sentence. If you do my approach it’s helpful to ask other people how they describe you.
What do you read, listen to, or watch?
Books:
Gogol’s The Overcoat
George Macdonald’s Phantastes
Dostoevsky’s Crime and Punishment
Bulgakov’s Master and Margarita
Yiannis Ritsos’s poetry
Music:
Yiannis Kotsiras’s To Agriolouloutho
Vladimir Vysotsky’s Fastidious Hourses
The Great Courses Plus Lectures:
Topics — Russian Literature, Ancient History/Archaeology, Greek Literature, Logic, Philosophy
Operas:
Eugene Onegin
The Pearl Fishers
Movies:
Doctor Zhivago
Okay I really felt like I needed movies but I honestly could not think of any (me unwilling to admit that I live for sitting blank-faced through horror movies) so I just used the one I watched most recently with a friend. Guys. You do not need to do this. Just leave it off if you’re not that interested in a category.
Some other stuff — my music taste, opera taste and book interests corresponded with my professed academic interests of Classics and Slavic Languages and Literatures elsewhere.
Other other stuff — please just be honest about what you like. I spent the first half of high school adhering to everyone ELSE’s music tastes but just go with it and embrace what you like. Admissions officers will notice if your interests are out of the ordinary (of course it’s not a bad thing to have standard music taste, just remember it’s not a bad thing to not, either).
One thing you are looking forward to at Stanford
Having interesting conversations (academic and non-academic) with a new diverse group of people. I come from a little town with little diversity of perspectives, so getting to know how others see the world is very important to me. I think this is part of what makes a rich learning environment.
Extra hour in the day
I would write a poem about how time is becoming commoditized and how little the world appreciates it until it is gone (all the while sipping mint tea).
Get sassy in your applications if you want to. I’m pretty sure midnight Chaidie wrote some of the snappier bits like this and the roommate essay.
Stanford-specific short essays
Reflect on an idea or experience that makes you excited about learning
The classroom thrummed with energy and anticipation. It seemed counterintuitive, what could elevate Thomas Hobbes to the exciting? But in the history classroom, somehow the energy of my history teacher’s animated face lit the room and caused minds to ponder new depths.
We had split into little groups of three and four, and I was seated with people I had spoken probably two words to outside of class. But, such is the power of conversation, we all poured out our ideas. It was that collaborative sense of hearing different perspectives and piecing together fragments to create the mosaic of history.
It is that height of academic conversation that excites me to learn. Learning transcends all backgrounds, having elements that go beyond subjective experience. At the same time, it unites different perspectives, because the more perspectives there are the more complete of any idea we find of the truth. I went from a little frightened at the prospect of shedding the comfort of my friend group to growing exuberance as I heard ideas I would never have thought of about Hobbes according to different people’s interest. People who naturally think about context took a structuralist approach, one economically inclined person saw the reading through a Marxist lens, another a feminist critique — far more than would ever have been thought up by one individual.
This little history discussion about a seemingly dense and objective text brought the life to learning for me by showing me the power of perspectives and conversation.
True story. Be honest. Sometimes the first thing that comes to your mind is the right one, even if it seems unoriginal. Just staying true to your own experiences and feelings will make it original.
Note to future roommate
Well this is embarrassing. I hope to god my future roommate never stumbles across it.
Most Esteemed Future Roommate,
If you walk in at 2:00AM to find me lying on the floor listening to depressing music by Vysotsky and clutching a volume by Homer or Dostoevsky like a teddy bear, please do not be alarmed. As an only child, I have never had to share my room except with a parent, and so the transition might be a little rocky (although I by all means invite you to my carpeted book and anguish club). Further, books have always brought me comfort, whether to escape from loneliness or the crowd (usually the latter, I’m rather introverted), and I alternate between daring to socialize and retreating upon a few beloved volumes to which I give equal or greater affection than people. In that line — I desire to know all of your favorite books — or the ones you detest — in order to know you better! Whenever I meet people, I think of what their story would be like, what author’s voice it might be written in, what the title would be. Needless to say, hit me up if you every want to borrow a book. Or a pen.
Yours bookishly,
Chaidie
Something meaningful to you and why
The novel Phantastes by George Macdonald was my childhood favorite book and crops up again in my mind with new meaning every passing year. As a child, my mum read it to me, and I loved it so much that it was one of the first full books I read on my own. Its meaning to me then was in the story; I admired the artful crafting of characters, artistic faerie lands and realistic houses which mingled reality, metaphor, and the grotesque with beautiful language. It played a large role in my early attempts at writing fantasy fiction and short stories. In middle school I reread it again, and found new meaning in the complexities of the characters and the changes in mindset and belief that Anodos, the main character, experienced throughout his trials. Several years later, after having developed an interest in Classics and having studied my own Greek heritage more in depth, I loved Macdonald’s incorporation of aspects of the Classical Greek world, from allusions to mythology and philosophy in the descriptions and characters to the Greek etymology of many of the character names (Anodos meaning ‘to progress upward’). Still an enthusiast for Classics and an aspiring writer, my current self still finds meaning in this childhood favorite. I revel in Macdonald’s brilliant use of language and mobilization of the metaphors of all time; it is his application of the Classics that inspire me to pursue that subject along with others to enrich my own writing and communication.
I changed this one a few times. I stuck with this version because I felt it was a good wrap, combining the subject of my personal statement with my family background and my academic interests in a satisfying, conclusive way. Tip: write about something you’re really fascinated by, something that has kept you up at nights and that your brain just goes back to for no apparent reason. Those are the things where your excitement will GLOW through the words on the page.
You’ve got this
College essays are a pain in the ass. There’s no way of summing yourself up perfectly. Admissions people probably won’t see you as a good match at every school you apply to. Not to mention the oppressive and discriminatory undertones that are historically literally engrained in the admissions process. But you’ll be okay. In the end, I feel like I learned quite a bit about myself by having to question how to sum myself up in so few freaking words. It really, really sucks, but you do end up getting something out of it, even if not what you initially expected to.
