On not making it

Charity Benignos
Sep 6, 2018 · 2 min read

I don’t get how in life, in any profession, any art

there is such a concept of not making it

I just passed my first song submission

and I didn’t make the cut

I was disheartened. Not more than when I failed my first college class

but nonetheless bad

I really thought they were good enough

But don’t you think I already did? Make it?

I made them.

For once in this world someone made those two particular songs

I made them.

I made it

The toxic thing about art is that no matter how hard you work

no matter how much time you’ve spent on your craft

molding it, treating it gently — its scary

because in any case- by some force- it can be rejected

-and it’s scary

But I think I’ve come to realize why

-in any sense I -in particular- can’t pursue art full time

-because at the other person’s mercy for me- it will lose its magic

-and we live in a world where you cannot live off being rejected

It’s scary

-when part of your life gets rejected

but I won’t stop

because art is the heart of the human soul

it cares-it loves-it beats

and when I made this passage- it was for me art

-it was not made solely to be heard

-but to prove I’m human

-I was here- and this is my story

-and we live in an age where anywhere in the world

-a listener may be nearby

and I don’t care if a thousand or just one

-is listening

the world in any person’s eyes is ugly, beautiful, treacherous, unfair, unforgiving

  • it is what it is- and not one perspective is above the other
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