TH3 R0Y@L @C@D3MY 0F $H@K3$P3@R3^$ F@GG0T$ PR3$3NT$
(a play by CHASE BURNS)
“Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling.” ~ J.D. (Heathers, 1988)
Prelude. The show is preluded by something gay.
Act 1, scene 1. PUCK enters and sings “Maybe This Time.”
Act 1, scene 2. Cue a dance track of John Barton talking about Shakespeare while PUCK performs movement inspired by this screenshot:
Act 2. The stage manager interrupts the play to recite a nonfiction essay about why they don’t want to be an actor (in the style of The Moth).
Act 3, scene 1. The cast plays a round of karaoke to Shakespearean sonnets. They drink cheap beer and have all the props you would find in a Korean karaoke bar.
Act 3, scene 2. LEAR enters. His objective is to convince the audience that theater isn’t necessary or enriching. He accomplishes his objective, but only at the *perfect* moment. Climax! We weep.
Act 4, scene 1. The cast watches a video on how to be a witch and then recites the video in chorus form.
Act 4, scene 2. HAMLET twerks for the ghost of his father. It’s so hot.
Act 4, scene 3. MACBETH becomes a lady and something like Patrick Cowley / Honey Soundsystem plays.
Act 4, scene 4. LEAR searches for pictures of Kenneth Branagh on the internet and shares them with the audience. It is tender and intimate.
Act 4, scene 5. The assistant stage manager holds the casts’ valuables for ransom. They will destroy these valuables if PUCK cannot get the audience to pay him the equivalent of his bar tab from last night.
Act 5. The cast desperately attempts to resolve a linear narrative.
