A heartfelt account

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Mateus Campos Felipe on Unsplash

“I wish we could walk out and leave all our belongings in the apartment as they are now, like a museum of us”, he said. Our marriage had ended, but we hadn’t moved out yet. He continued, “We could visit perhaps, but it wouldn’t be necessary. It would just be comforting to know that somewhere in the world, there is a piece of our life frozen in time, continuing to survive.” Breath escaped me. It was one of the most beautiful concepts I had ever heard.

My now ex-husband always had a knack for gorgeous imagery. After we split up…

Research says I might be on to something

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Martin Sattler on Unsplash

My First Experience

I was on my way home from quitting a part-time job I hated. Sitting on the train heading back to my University, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders and began to sense unintelligible utterances that wanted to come out welling up inside me. A familiar aura accompanied the feeling. I had experienced it once before while I was laying in bed late at night after a day teaching English at a school in Italy.

It was a full immersion English camp, so I didn’t speak Italian, and the students and family I lived with didn’t speak much English…

The story of how my Dad became my best friend

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Steven Abraham on Unsplash

My parents divorced when I was two years old, so I don’t remember living with my Dad. I oscillate between idealizing and catastrophizing what could have happened to my relationship with him if I spent my childhood under his roof. Since that ship has sailed, I’ll tell you what actually happened.

He got sober, proposed to my soon to be Stepmom and left town to move in with her. I have vague memories of the night he told my older brother and me that he was relocating 450 miles away. I remember not wanting to make him feel bad by…

A story about two strangers

The inside of a Parisian cathedral softly lit in the evening
The inside of a Parisian cathedral softly lit in the evening
Photo by Author

You hear stories about people encountering what they felt were angels in human form. I never believed them until I met Christopher.

It was a cold November, and I was in Paris for work. A musician I worked with had just played a show in a beautiful old church, and as we exited the sold-out gig via the side door, a man jumped up off the stoop while quickly gathering his sleeping bag and belongings that blocked our way.

The priest who was walking us out didn’t bat an eyelid, which brought me some comfort as I worried he would…

2020 was subconsciously tricky for me, and 2021 appears to offer more of the same

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Conscious Design on Unsplash

The Ache

For the past few months, I have experienced a dull ache in my chest that has perplexed me. Although my dog caring business has taken a big hit due to the pandemic, my savings, supportive partner, and the measly US stimulus check have kept me afloat. Countless times my other half and I have spoken about our gratefulness for the local parks, a balcony, our healthy relationship, and relative financial security. There are people far more pressed than we are. …

I also don’t believe we can stomach or justify an extreme revolution

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Hasan Almasi on Unsplash

I have heard and read it from many over the past few months — politicians, white Liberals, middle-aged church ladies, and now even the divider in chief himself — “We need to unify and heal our nation.” Say what? Are you kidding me?

The “unity call” is one area I agree with angry Trumpers. It’s hypocritical. And if we are honest with ourselves, it’s not even what we desire. We are two nations living in the same land, pretending we have enough common ground to be of the same flesh.

A couple of years ago, my once-Republican Dad, who lives…

Animal Anecdote

Kinship is everywhere if you are open to it

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by kevin laminto on Unsplash

For over five years, I’ve lived in a beautiful, village-like area in London where independent restaurants, coffee shops, and grocers sit next to the equally independent book shop and pet store on the tiny high street. We have a dentist, doctor’s office, a gorgeous park full of dogs and children, and the homes are quintessentially Londonish while the community centre and local paper provide connectedness. Don’t even get me started on the cozy mewses. I would kill for a home on a mews.

I inherited this idyllic location not through merit, but romantic commitment. I moved in with my other…

A deeper look at the dance of an authentic life

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Ali Pazani on Unsplash

At first, I wasn’t particularly eager to write this piece because the topic of “living authentically” has become watered down, packaged and marketed to the masses. Still, there is a reason why the idea resonates deeply with people.

Naturally, we are born whole, free and contented, but we and society add layers on top of ourselves, which can cause the disturbing tangledness we experience. Some of these layers are painful individual inflictions at the hands of others, such as abuse in any form. …

Will you let her?

Image for post
Image for post
Photo by Ihor Malytskyi on Unsplash

I’m sitting in the living room, sipping my morning coffee. It’s doomsday or jubilee or just another day depending on who you are and what beliefs you hold about politics. For me, I’m a wreck with a bundle of emotions — cautious hope, despair over what we have become or what we’ve always been, indifference over anything of depth changing even if he is booted out, anxiety in the waiting.

I hear my other half begin to shuffle around the other room, followed by the sound of comfort only Tracy Chapman can bring. …

Chelsea London

Expansiveness enthusiast who left the music industry to live a monastic-inspired life in the city. Oklahoma-raised Londoner. Ex-vangelical. Dog sitter. 🪐

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store