The population in New York is divided into two types of people: the locals and those who can never seem to get the hell out of the way. I have inhabited this city for approximately four days. My motto: fake it till you make it. If you act like a native New Yorker, you might even become one someday. After observing the behaviorisms on the streets of this fine city, I’ve learned a thing or two on acting natural.

1. If you haven’t been cursed at, at least once, you’re doing something wrong.
2. Never wait for the light to change, it’s a sign of weakness. Venture into the road and never look back.
3. Stop comparing the food to back home. The bagels are large and the pizza is thin. All you need to know is that it’s gospel food. End of story.
4. If you stop in the middle of the street, you will get trampled over. Either move to the side or keep walking. New Yorkers know what they want, when they want it. Indeciveness doesn’t fly here.
5. Learn how to swipe your MetroCard. Holding up the line is a fast way to lose friends.
6. Learn the difference between Uptown and Downtown.
7. Know your cross streets. This isn’t the suburbs.
8. Stop treating Starbucks like its the best coffee around. Get yourself a signature New York coffee cup with blue and white trim for your trip on the subway.
9. Always fold your pizza and hold it straight. Dipping it back = grease dribbling down your chin. Failing to recognize the efficient way to eat pizza is like refusing to embrace the spirit of New York.
10. Recognize that each neighborhood in New York has a completely different culture. Skip the Statue of Liberty and go explore them. Bonus points if you can reference a hipster type dive in the Village in conversation.