There are a myriad of relationship possibilities. Many people flounder because they try to force something that isn’t right or that their partner isn’t ready for. Life is longer than we think, so it’s best to enjoy the person we are with one step at a time, regardless of where it goes. If it doesn’t work then it’s another good story for the nursing home.
But this is actually a story about marriage. About how the precedents we set (even subconsciously) at the beginning of our relationships start to define our roles and our interactions. And even though nothing is set in stone, it’s hard work to accept the ways you’ve changed, harder still to accept the ways in which your partner has changed, and even harder still to break these cycles and find new normals. My husband doesn’t (by any stretch of the imagination) expect me to cook dinner, but the scheduling, rituals, and ingrained habits that have to change if I decide to write dinner out of my life are bigger than not cooking any more. There would have to be a shift in responsibility, a reallocating of duties and expectations. And that is really difficult to do in a marriage.
I’m a fat, bald, short guy whose only quality is that he isn’t an ax murderer. I want to find the One, the special relationship that will last many years and multiply happiness. Relationships are multipliers of life experiences.