Everything I’m not

Kanye West’s album ‘Graduation’ came up on Spotify the other day. The album came out in 2007, which was the year I finished High School. I got a job as a delivery driver for an up-market wine retailer in Adelaide that same year, which saw me on the road alot, listening to music with primarily this album left on repeat, as it was one of the only CD’s my manager had in the stack.

There were songs on it that had all these hidden meanings and I found it fascinating to figure out what they were at the time. The one song on there that really struck a nerve with me was called “Everything I am”, and it wasn’t until around 2013 until I really embodied the meaning behind it.

I went to Carbon Festival in Melbourne, which is a series of forums on contemporary, creative-culture, fashion design and street style. Eddie Huang was one of the guest speakers, who I had been following through his “fresh off the boat” vice series & book, as well as his restaurant Bao Haus.

The main theme he talked about was identity, which was also an underlying theme in his book (which I highly recommend to read). He reinforced how you have to own who you are, love who you are, and not to let anybody shame you. He went on to give examples of people and pop-culture characters on TV who embody that, one example was Hannah from Girls (Lena Dunham). She is a slightly overweight, confused girl with no real life direction that isn’t exactly “pretty”, yet she owns everything about her, and it makes her character so strong and her voice so unique.

“Once you know who you are, know who you ain’t”

One of the main things I struggled with when I was younger, was what society expects of you. I needed small doses of courage to be able to build up my confidence and believe in something, or in most cases, not believing in something.

There are lots of things i’m not comfortable in doing, and I always viewed that as a weakness. Instead, I now see it as a valuable part of my personality.

In conclusion, through these small pieces of inspiration, I’ve learnt that I have constantly been trying to figure out “who I am”, and what I “should” be doing.
I had that all wrong. It’s not what you do as a person, or how you are that defines you — I have learnt it’s mainly also what you don’t do, or what you don’t like, or what you can’t do that shapes who you are.

Let me know if you feel it man,
Cause everything I’m not made me everything I am.