Its been a while…why is my ex contacting me?

Nnylen kiken
Sep 6, 2018 · 2 min read

Because they’re lonely. Horny. Miss you. Want you back. Want to be friends. Want to checkup. Want to make sure your fine. Want to validate their decision. Want to validate themselves. Want to make sure you’re not fine (schadenfreude.) Their new relationship is shit and wondered if… They heard your in a new relationship and wondered if… To congratulate you on the good news, they were always hoping you’d move away, get a promotion, get married, always rooting for you. To console you, they heard the bad news and just wanted to make sure you were okay, your family is okay? To manipulate you, to see if they still have a hold on you. To connect… you still have a hold over them. They hate you and want to let you know. They love you and want to let you know…

Doesn’t matter why.

What matters is the relationship didnt work.

What matters is where you are on your healing journey.

Until your fully healed, indulging in contact from the ex will be like picking at a scab.

What they want doesn’t matter. What you need does. Focus on yourself. Love yourself. Heal.

I reckon once your healed, you’ll know the appropriate response… because when your healed, what they say to you doesn’t matter. You know where you stand. And if they take your response the wrong way it won’t matter as you’ve made peace with them not being in your life.

Still though… to all exes reaching out after a long time has passed, here’s a tip…

Don’t.

Nnylen kiken

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Musings about life from someone trying to figure it all out