Men Dump Their Anger Into Women
Emma Lindsay

Really interesting post.

On men: Not all men are impossible. And not all men need to do yoga to avoid being impossible. In fact, there are a lot of men who are able to vent, to just listen, to discuss and to move on.

One thing to note: anger is ok. Violence is not okay. Violence and anger are different things.

On mental disorders: I think it is important to recognize that there are personality traits and mental disorders at play that men may have more persistently than women. For example: men who are passive aggressive. Men who are narcissists. Men who are straight up violent criminals and will always be violent because they have antisocial personality disorder. Rapists. These men may be that way because of society but that doesn’t make them any less defective. No amount of yoga is going to fix a serial rapist.

On power: However, there is data that shows that such acts related to mental disorders (antisocial violence, serial rapists) could be avoided all together perhaps if we ALL changed how we viewed power and what we value in society. It has been shown that statistically, maternal societies have very low to no incidences of sex crimes or violent crime against women, and generally low incidence of crime against the person (crimes like battery assault, etc. ) — that would suggest that your point is correct that power has something to do with it. But, you can go a step further to say that where women have power, everyone benefits v/v bodily safety . People in those societies generally don’t think violence is a means to accomplishment. Rather, violence isn’t tolerated at all and is a sign of weakness. so if physical prowess is the opposite of powerful, then size and braun and girth doesn’t mean much. If violence leads to total alienation from society, and the immediate reaction of fear by one person will be met with only disparagement by others (rather than more fear), then the urge to do it becomes kind of weird, woozy, conflicted and unappealing. As a result, the crime rate is lower because to be a citizen who causes fear in others is to be essentially seen as pathetic and worthless. Think about how different that mentality is than a street gang or mafia mentality. By changing the reaction to violence as a society, could it be possible to decrease the violence itself?

You said yourself that the men you know are crippled by loneliness. What if we mandatorily isolated every violent person from the benefits of society for their violence (and I don’t mean prison, I mean stripping them of all of their rights as a citizen — the right to marry, the right to have children, the right to own a business, the right to vote, to see their parents, etc. If the violent reaction was treated as the excommunicating trait, one might see a society focusing a lot more on what the fuck is wrong with Billy the Bully and less on worrying about “why is my child gay?”

Everyone has a right to be angry, but no one should have the right to be violent. Violence against others should be punished as though it were the most abhorrent offense rather than a minor offense or an understandable way to act out when feeling angry.

Like what you read? Give Clay-er a round of applause.

From a quick cheer to a standing ovation, clap to show how much you enjoyed this story.