“Where are you really from?”
Marie Zafimehy

dear marie, hello.

i am chris, and i’ve read all of your story.

indeed, i agree with you, its horrible and really insensitive of a person to ask such questions to someone else because of their colour/ethnic characteristics, and it can hurt that persons feelings, so all-in-all, your post is correct and im on your side with this.

however, (in my humble opinion), this person probably asked all those questions (probably) out of curiocity, and not out of racism.

i mean, i dont think that he is racist. yes, the man at the party who asked you those things is certainly an insesitive, indelicate person, a jerk/idiot perhaps, but he doesn’t seem as a ‘’racist’’ to me.(so far).

what im trying to say is, that YES, people should be more reasonable and people should STOP asking awkward questions to people that have a different colour/ethnic characteristics,

but still, if someone is asking those questions at a party, its because he/she is an idiot, and doesnt knows how to react properly/politely in a conversation.

bottom line: racists can be idiots, but not ALL idiots can be racists.

also, the part where you mention that : ‘’ every single anecdote i referred to happened in europe, and european students asked these awkward questions.’’ shocked me beyond comprehension.

is it possible that european citizens/students/people can be SO IGNORANT?

or so insensitive? i am genuinely shocked.

i expected better things from citizens of a (so-called) civilised society/union.

anyways, if i were you, i would ignore such acts of stupidity, because it can be rude (because they ARE rude), it can be awful (obviously), but still, its not racist. its just stupidity/bad choice of words.

as for the ‘’exotic’’ remark, its not a bad thing.

i mean, probably the italian who told you that was impressed by your beauty, and he was not being a racist at all.

afterall, i have seen many people saying other people ‘’exotic’’, for having a unique characteristic that surprises natives of a land. (like for example, a chinese person could call a white man/woman ‘’exotic’’, due to that person being unique and/or different than the natives of this land, in our example, china.)

so, yes. i shall call a portion of those people awkward, or naive, or insensitive, or indelicate. but racist? no.

and thats why i find it kinda unfair that you use the tags ‘’racism’’ in your article. i mean, lets be fair.

what the guy did at the party was stupid, but racism? dunno. i doubt it.

(so, he is ‘’innocent’’, unless proven otherwise)

that is all.

love who you are, and live life peacefully. thats all that matters.

and if someone asks you next time: ‘’where are you really from?!’’

just ignore them, and talk to a better person. trust me, its better.

i for one, have never asked, and i will NEVER do such an insensitive thing in my life.

and if it counts for anything, i do believe that you are from france/that you are a french person.

if you are born in a country, you are a living, breathing part of this country. and i support you, my good lady.

those are my two cents.

plz dont call me an idiot/bad names.