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Dildo perpetrators almost always buy dildos within their own race, meaning the suspect is most certainly Caucasian. By choosing to throw the dildo outdoors, the dildo criminal demonstrated that he was an experienced day-time dildo thrower. The dildo thrower is an intelligent man, but one who is very insecure. This insecurity is primarily because of the inferior feeling he has as a Buffalo fan, which was caused by a lack of Super Bowl wins, intensified because he was surrounded by members of the New England Patriots. He is also shy, strongly dependent upon humiliating others with dildo throwing to overcome fear of getting humiliated in his relationships with opposing teams.

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