The Potential Timelines of Notre Dame Football’s Upcoming Season
I have no idea how the 2017–2018 campaign is going to play out…but I have considered some scenarios for how things will go for the Fighting Irish

One of the greatest and most original episodes of any television show is Community’s “Remedial Chaos Theory.” This episode is so influential that it has its own extensive Wikipedia page. For anyone not familiar with the show or the episode, I’ll provide a brief summary.
- A seven person study group gathers at a housewarming party and sits around a table to play “Yahtzee”
- The hosts have ordered pizza; the pizza arrives but none of the group members want to head downstairs to pick up the pizza
- The “leader” of the group, Jeff, devises a plan to decide who gets the pizza by tossing the dice in the air and assigning each member a number (it is later realized that everyone has a number except for Jeff and the group forces him to get the pizza in what is the real timeline)

The seven timelines vary widely. Some of the timelines are positive; some are catastrophically negative. The only constants across the seven timelines are that Jeff hits his head on a ceiling fan and whomever gets the pizza ultimately returns to the apartment with the pizza.
It is tough to get a feel for how the Notre Dame Fighting Irish will perform in the upcoming college football season.
As Joshua Vowles declares in a post on SB Nation’s One Foot Down (a Notre Dame blog), the Fighting Irish “will not go undefeated and win the national championship” and they “will not go winless.” Every other scenario is on the table.
Which leads me to the seven timelines of Notre Dame Football for 2017–2018:
Timeline 1: This timeline offers moderate drama but is probably the most ho-hum of all the timelines in the episode. I translate this into a season in which the Irish have a couple gradual peaks and valleys but ultimately put forth a respectable-for-most-programs 9–4 season. They lose in a blowout to Georgia in September and fans are concerned and upset; they proceed to take care of business and win every game until they lose a late-October home game against rival USC by a touchdown; they follow this with back-to-back home wins against ACC foes NC State and Wake Forest; they lose a sloppy game on the road to Miami, after which fans lament a blown opportunity to advance in the rankings; they pull off an exciting home win over Navy on the Irish’s Senior Day; they lose the regular season finale by two touchdowns on the road against a good Stanford Cardinal team; they beat a decent but uninspired Tennessee squad in the Belk Bowl and finish the season ranked 20th; it is a step forward from last season but relatively boring and Irish fans reflect on how the squad underachieved and squandered many opportunities.
Timeline 2: There is some controversy and turmoil in this timeline, but it still avoids veering into a totally disastrous season for the Irish. It follows a similar path as Timeline 1 with a couple key differences. They lose an October road game against a mediocre-at-best North Carolina squad; they follow this loss with a blowout loss to USC at home; they beat Miami in a game that neither team deserves to win; they lose in overtime to Navy on Senior Day; they finish the regular season with a blowout loss at Stanford; the Irish accept a bid to the Pinstripe Bowl in Yankee Stadium and lose to Nebraska in an entertaining game in which neither team plays any defense; they finish 7–6 and unranked in the final polls; it’s still an improvement upon last season’s 4–8 finish but many Irish fans are loud in their disapproval of the team’s performance during the season-ending three-game losing streak; Coach Brian Kelly’s job security is a topic on many sports talk shows, although most pundits feel his job is safe.
Timeline 3: Finally, a definitively positive timeline! Notre Dame goes undefeated during September, including a statement win against Georgia; the Irish are 6–0 and enter the USC game with a top-ten ranking; College Gameday is on campus in South Bend for the game and Notre Dame Stadium is rocking all night, but the Irish lose a close game to their rivals; the Irish then suffer a hangover loss to a competent NC State team and things get tense in South Bend; the Irish right the ship and win three straight games against Wake Forest, Miami, and Navy and head into the regular season finale at Stanford with a 9–2 record and a top-twenty ranking; the Irish pull off a thrilling road win over the Cardinal to close out the regular season at 10–2; they receive an invitation to the Orange Bowl and beat Clemson en route to an 11–2 record and a top-ten final ranking; even the hard-to-please Irish fans admit this was a great season.
Timeline 4: Things get considerably darker and weirder in this one. The Irish lose the season opener at home to Temple and follow it up with a dud in a blowout loss to Georgia in Week Two; they beat Boston College the following week but it’s a close game and Irish fans are noticeably irritated with the program; then the Irish dismantle Michigan State on the road the following week and the outside noise starts to quiet a bit as the team sits at 2–2 with an easy home game against Miami (OH) the following week which should put them at 3–2; however, in typical ND fashion, they overlook the opponent and lose a stupid game to Miami (OH); they are now 2–3 and have roughly a zero-percent chance of reaching the College Football Playoff and it’s only September; they barely beat a lackluster North Carolina team on the road to get to 3–3; everyone prepares themselves for a shellacking at the hands of the rival USC Trojans (ranked in the top-five) in the next game; the Irish stun USC in overtime and the fans go absolutely nuts as South Bend parties all night; despite a mediocre 4–3 record, Irish fans start talking themselves into slim Playoff chances; they handle NC State to get to 5–3; now we’re talking, the Irish are back and all is right with the world; the following week the Irish turn the ball over five times and lose at home to Wake Forest, thus eliminating any slim Playoff chances; the Irish follow this loss with an embarrassing performance on the road at Miami (FL) and fall to 5–5; somehow, the Irish manage to beat a tough Navy team on Senior Day; unsurprisingly, they get handled by Stanford in the regular season finale; the Irish accept a bid to play in the Independence Bowl against an equally disappointing Arkansas team; Arkansas wins and its Head Coach Bret Bielema gushes about the feeling of kneeling in the victory formation against the Irish as the clock wound down; the Irish finish 6–7 and the dissatisfaction among fans is LOUD after a second consecutive losing season.
Timeline 5: This timeline is the darkest timeline. Notre Dame opens the season with two straight home losses, just like Timeline 4; the Irish then proceed to lose to a bad BC team in Boston and then experience a crushing loss to Michigan State on the road the next week; they finish September with a home win against a bad Miami (OH) squad to put them at 1–4; the Irish give a good effort but make too many mistakes in a road loss to North Carolina; they return home the following week and get run off their own turf in a blowout loss to USC; they improbably respond by beating NC State in their next game, but any momentum from this win does not carry over as they lay an egg against Wake Forest the following week; the Irish are 2–7 with three games remaining; they have already guaranteed a second-straight losing season; they lose to Miami (FL) in a valiant effort on the road; oh well, 2–8, but maybe they’ll come out with another valiant effort and rally to a Senior Day win over Navy; they lose to Navy as the Midshipmen and their Triple Option offense run rampant in Notre Dame Stadium; Notre Dame limps into the finale against the Stanford Cardinal who mercifully only defeat the Irish by two touchdowns; 2–10; the Irish somehow got worse after an awful 4–8 season in 2016–2017; the criticism from Notre Dame fans reaches a deafening roar; everyone will be amazed if Coach Kelly keeps his job.

Timeline 6: Things get a bit tumultuous and awkward in South Bend during this timeline, but it’s not the worst-case scenario. The Irish start 1–0 after a nice win against a charged-up Temple squad; they follow this by losing a close game at home to Georgia in Week Two; they go to Boston and beat BC in an ugly game the following week, prompting many to wonder what kind of season this will be; the answer becomes a bit clearer the following week as the Irish get handled by an iffy Michigan State squad; the Irish return home and beat Miami (OH) to finish September with a 3–2 record; October gets off to a rough start though, as they go out to Chapel Hill and lose to an iffy North Carolina team in a poorly-played game; after a bye week, the Irish look flat in a rivalry game at home as they never recover from an early 28–0 deficit and wind up losing by two touchdowns; many in South Bend begin to question Coach Kelly as his team sits at 3–4 and looked out of sorts coming out of a bye week; the questioning persists after a narrow home loss against NC State in which the play-calling is predictable and ineffective in the fourth quarter; the Irish rebound and trample Wake Forest at home the following week, and follow it up with an impressive road win against Miami (FL) to even their record at 5–5; they notch another win the next week against Navy on Senior Day, but end the regular season at 6–6 after getting roughed up at Stanford; the Irish accept their first ever Quick Lane Bowl bid and play an in-state opponent that they have not seen in a while: the Indiana Hoosiers; the Hoosiers team and its fans are clearly far more excited about this matchup than are the Irish team and its fans and IU wins an exciting game and celebrates exuberantly as the Irish clinch a second-consecutive losing season; Irish fans are sad and embarrassed and make their feelings known as they fill the message boards and shout into the airwaves that it’s time to replace Coach Kelly. The Notre Dame Athletic Department publicly remains committed to retaining Coach Kelly.
Timeline 7: After a weird season-opening loss to Temple, Irish fans are undoubtedly still bitter about the 2016–2017 season and prematurely hit the panic button and declare the 2017–2018 season a lost cause and begin to ruminate on the possibilities for the program’s next coach. In one of his finest moments as the leader of the Notre Dame Football program, Coach Kelly gives an honest and hopeful speech at his weekly press conference and implores the fans to be patient and stay optimistic as this team will figure things out and establish a winning identity during the season.
The Irish come from behind in the fourth quarter to defeat a good Georgia team in Week Two; they cruise against Boston College and Michigan State on the road; they come back home and obliterate Miami (OH) to finish September with a 4–1 record; the Irish start October much the way they ended September as they control the entire game against North Carolina and leave Chapel Hill with a 5–1 record heading into the bye week. The showdown against USC looms large with potential Playoff implications; the Irish lose a heartbreaker to the Trojans in triple-overtime, but USC is a top-five team and the game was so close that the loss does not change the Irish’s ranking; the Irish appear to be on a mission as they crush ACC foes NC State and Wake Forest in consecutive weeks; they travel down to Miami next and play a great game against the Hurricanes and escape with a narrow victory; Senior Day sends the senior class off in style as the Irish take care of Navy at home; the regular season then concludes on a high note as the Irish take care of business on the road against a solid Stanford team; with a 10–2 record and a quality resume, the Irish do not make the Playoff but they do receive an invite to the Fiesta Bowl where they are pitted against their longtime rivals, the Michigan Wolverines; the Irish beat the Wolverines with a late touchdown and the fans are happy; Coach Kelly is the toast of the town throughout the winter in South Bend.
In the episode of Community, the seventh timeline was the real one. As an Irish supporter, I hope Notre Dame’s upcoming season follows my projected seventh timeline. It’s certainly the most fun scenario. The Irish wouldn’t appear in the Playoff but a Playoff berth shouldn’t be a realistic scenario for this team anyway.
Let’s agree to enjoy the season and appreciate this current squad for what it is: a flawed but fun team with the potential to have an outstanding season that culminates in a big-time Bowl win. And we’ll all be dancing in the concourse at the Fiesta Bowl while the national media and jaded fans of Playoff finalists (Jeff, in this scenario) scoff at our celebration. But who cares about them? I’ll gleefully take 11 wins and a Fiesta Bowl trophy. For the current iteration of Notre Dame Football, this is our Best Timeline. And I’m perfectly fine with that. Three cheers for old Notre Dame!
