Update for “hard times”
Obsession is something trunks of the trees are feeling into newborn spring or the wolfs facing the full moon.
The feelings that experience a human being very different from all these since we are (hurray!) CONSCIOUS. We have amazing opportunity THINK OVER IT, then think over it again, priceless expression: “SLEEP WITH IT”, wake up with it and think it again.
Yeah, there is this great advice we all heard “do not think too much”. If you realize how our head works and how many things it does with any information that drops in, this is just ridiculous to expect you do not think too much or that you could even physically accomplish to not think. Our amazing brain can do lots of things with information, especially the one which faces a conflict inside us, but not command do not think about it.
Consider, reconsider, deny, accept, ignore, interpret, misinterpret, project, reassumes, suppress and sublimate. If someone wants to go deeper in all that things here is please the personality studies book https://numerons.files.wordpress.com/2012/04/personality.pdf, page 44. And much more useful read, same link.
An empirical experience you can find in here with deep data of the prisoners facing their hard times and all that stages I mentioned. https://www.repository.cam.ac.uk/bitstream/handle/1810/255859/Wright_et_al-2016-Theoretical_Criminology-AM.pdf?sequence=1 (very nice for people who feel from time to time like me that life sucks, so for all people).
You are welcome.
I got away from topic, but I think you caught the idea- our mechanism works much more complicated then just obsession or do not think about it, is very much more. So do not worry if you are tortured other day by same situation or you are in the middle of decision for ages or you just can not stop crying over same thing. Thanks to our marvelous brain, which can do so many things in so many ways and varieties.
And as more as we feed it, as more as we grow it, fulfill it with studies, opening horizons, blowing it with languages, with the advanced system read, making it more sharp, — as more we get problems with ourselves every little time some smallest error is happening in our universe.
Something we just need to sleep with gets into such a pro-analysis of that amazing advanced system we created!
Thank you, software update, you are marvelous.
P.S. From all that stages mentioned, when you are facing hard times just concentrate on sublimation one as much as possible. Make all that unreleased thing you have inside flow into something new made by you. Draw, sing, cook, paint, work (and work out also works great), plant, write a poem, a book or just a post on Medium, like I just did.
Feels much better.
Creation is the only way out somehow, because you literally draw yourself a door that did not exist before you made it.