Many people I talk to are disinterested in churches and religions. I often hear people point out a church’s shortcomings. “The church I grew up in didn’t have room for questioning and doubt.” “Church people hate me because I’m gay.” So many people seem to be saying “churches shouldn’t be like that, they should be more . . .” (fill in the blank).

When you are a minister (like I am) or regular church-goer, you spend a lot of time in a church community with what would be called (I guess) religious people. And you see things others don’t see. Something fascinating does happen occasionally, and I’d guess it’s quietly happening all the time in a handful of people in each church. People’s bond to God or the church is being strengthened by the unexpected. Something intangible happens within them. It might be hidden from view. It’s often hard to put into words. Maybe they see a tenderness in another church goer. Maybe they see a rich authentic fondness someone has for Jesus. Maybe even a teaching from the Bible pierces into their soul like nothing else has been able to. Or maybe something happens privately in prayer or when receiving communion… something no one will ever know about except them.

The question about what a church should be like tells more about us as we answer the question than it does about anything firm and long lasting. The answers of millennials will be different from the answers of their grandchildren.

I think that in the unexpected sparks of discovery and divinity the real power of church comes into play. And so it doesn’t really matter what we’re hoping for from a church, or the reason we give for leaving our last one.

What matters might be whether we are present to the unexpected.

Whether we have left room for mystery.