Stay On Course or Just Roll With It?

Last night I went to bed with a plan on what to do this morning. This morning I changed that plan and am trying to figure out if that’s worked for the better or for the worse. I’m less stressed in some ways and more stressed in at least one way. To be less cryptic, my original plan was to walk the dog, have breakfast, head to church, stop for coffee on the way home, then start tackling my work responsibilities. Instead, I ended up walking the dog, going back outside to take a couple of pictures, since the fog was looking pretty cool on the river, have breakfast, then sit at my computer to write. The impetus for the change is something I need to get done related to work this morning earlier than I originally expected. My original idea was that by not running back out and getting the day started earlier, I’d be less stressed as the day started picking up steam.

I found myself instinctively sitting down at the computer after breakfast to start writing and it occurred to me that I may be doing this to try and collect and center myself, by locking-in and getting ready to “get things done”. I’m not sure that’s the right way of going about collecting and centering myself now, especially because I started getting pulled into online distractions, rather than just sitting to write. After about 15 minutes I was able to pull myself back around and start writing this post.

Now looking back, letting myself start messing around with Instagram (you can find my pictures here) first thing in the morning then became the gateway to peeking glances at my email during breakfast, and getting distracted at my computer before I was able to actually focus on writing.

So anyway, that’s where I find myself this morning. I’m not quite sure if it would’ve been better to stay on course or just roll with it, as I chose to do, by changing my schedule. It could be that the outcome isn’t as binary as I’d like it to be and this is another example of putting myself in an in-between state that I’m trying to let myself exist in more often as time progresses.