10 | On Love.

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Jul 21, 2017 · 1 min read

“I’m not sure if we fall in love with people or if we fall in love with the way they make us feel, the ways they expand who we are and wish to be.

I can’t help but think that if it weren’t for how those interests were stoked in that relationship, I might never have recognized how badly I craved a life like those depicted in the books on my shelf, a patchwork of stories about faraway places.

Shortly after starting my new role, I went back to my therapist and told her: “It’s been a year since we broke up. I thought my dream job and exercise would heal me, but I still think about him every day. What more can I do to let go?”

First, she told me a story about a man she loved in her early 20s, nearly 50 years ago, whom she still thinks about to this day. Then she said: “You’re asking the wrong question. It’s not about getting over and letting go.”

I looked down at my hands and considered how this could possibly be about anything else.

“It’s about honoring what happened,” she said. “You met a person who awoke something in you. A fire ignited. The work is to be grateful. Grateful every day that someone crossed your path and left a mark on you.” ”

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I write my ikigai here.

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