Navigating post-lockdown as an empath
Lessons learned in mindfulness and how to up your self-care
The full-length version of this article is posted on my blog.
If you are familiar with the words “empath” and “HSP — highly sensitive person”, I hope that this brings you support and please know that you are not alone. If these terms are new to you, I highly encourage you to read on because you might learn something new about yourself or about someone close to you.
While I will not go into an in-depth definition of these terms, highly sensitive people and empaths, are people who are very sensitive to stimuli, including other people’s moods/energies, sounds, movement, smells etc… The difference between a highly sensitive person and an empath is that the empath is more prone to take on a stimulus like someone else’s mood or emotion and experience it as their own. For myself, what this looks like more practically is that large groups of people tend to be quite stimulating for my nervous system due to how much energy is present in the space. Earlier on in my journey, this was totally overwhelming… picture walking down a busy street with everyone stopping to tell you how they feel that day. As an empath, you know or feel intuitively whether someone is having a good or bad day without necessarily asking them about it. It’s not like reading their mind or anything close to psychic abilities but more like a trustworthy intuitive feeling.
The flip side if you’re new to this and are currently thinking to yourself that life must be really challenging as an empath or HSP, is that it creates avenues for the unfolding of intuitive processes and talents. For example, I have always had a deep affinity with animals and the natural world and learned quite young to communicate with animals and resource myself completely in the presence of nature. Many people who work in fields that specifically set out to help others (e.g., healers, psychologists, lawyers, veterinarians…) tend to be highly sensitive or empathic allowing them to be more attuned to the causes and beings they are serving.
Now that you have a slightly better understanding of these concepts, I’ll share a bit more about how my recent trip to Europe illuminates this journey of finding balance and center mindfully (and yes I said it, it’s a journey baby).
As a French native, empath and highly sensitive person, I was delighted to finally be able to visit family and friends these last few weeks and also noticed how much more intense this process felt after having restricted social interactions for over a year. I found that I had more social anxiety than before the pandemic when in the presence of friends of friends whom I didn’t know or when at larger group gatherings, even outdoors. And to be honest, I don’t think you need to be more sensitive or empathic to feel that way — it is completely normal to have an adaptation period or altered experience when returning to our new covid world reality. A few of my coping tools included taking breaks in between social engagements: finding time to be alone, even if just for a few minutes in a bathroom stall or going for a short walk outside. Sometimes just sitting still with my eyes closed and checking in with my breath allowed me to reset my nervous system, as would allowing tears to flow and just be. I always journal at night because I find that the quality of my sleep improves when I am able to process some of the day’s experiences through writing, instead of relying mostly on my dreams. Another accessible self-regulating technique that I like to do in the evening is to take a hot shower before going to bed, allowing body and mind to unwind. There’s something about engaging in a creative process like writing or singing/instrumental at the end of the day and intentionally caring for the body (eg. hot shower, hot tea, self-massage etc…) that is deeply nourishing for the soul.
Engaging with these practices during my trip was essential in creating a balance between my internal reality and externally felt experience. In addition, there was one self-care routine that I consciously chose to prioritize every day because of how important it is to my mental health and that’s exercising. This is not necessarily one that suits everyone but is a practice that is important in my life and one that I know significantly supports my wellbeing. In fact, when I teach about self-care, I always tell people that the key is to assess what is right for you in that moment or on that day. Over time, you become more and more adept at knowing your own structure and anticipating the kind of ritual or practice that you might need but it is always good to check-in mindfully each time. And personally, I don’t stick with just one form or length of exercise, some days all I have time for is yoga and stretching, other days I went for a run or did a full body workout. What mattered most was that I took that time to myself, usually in the morning before other life obligations arose. Whatever it is you do, I recommend dedicating yourself fully to it for the amount of time that you are doing it thus allowing the benefits of your own self-care and authenticity to ripple out into the lives of everyone you cross paths with each day. And for my fellow empaths, it’s okay (and vital) to prioritize this because everyone has beauty to share with the world and we can only do so if we remember to find our center and the sweet balance between giving and receiving.
Much love to you and if you would like to continue this conversation with me privately, you can reach out to me on my Instagram page or shoot me an email at livingwithclarityblog@gmail.com.
