Buzzword: LinkyBrain

Time for the outsiders to speak out

I have a Linky Brain. Feels good to write it down. I have a linky brain and I think because of that I am constantly afraid that there is another career/prospect out there more suitable for me and my greatest fear is not being able to try all the things that I want to try. All the things that the world has to offer. There is so much out there that interests me and I am very all or nothing in everything I pursue… but I want to pursue the right thing and make use of the limited time that I have on this earth! I’m very aware of the time I put into things.

When I was younger and people asked me what I wanted to be, I genuinely couldn’t answer them. It baffled me how people decided what they wanted to do in life when there was just SO MUCH choice?! So i threw myself into school. I loved learning and I was that kid that didn’t cry for her mum at the school gates, i just wanted to GO. Go and LEARN. This lasted for a time. Until I got to secondary and realised I was reasonably bright and could get along quite well doing the bare minimum… my teachers LOVED me.. I think I heard the words ‘so much potential’ like a tape on replay. It frustrated the hell out of my parents, but it didn’t bother me so much… it meant I had time to explore other things outside of school.

I was very lucky to have parents who let me try everything. So that’s exactly what I did.

As I got older I did the a-level thing and the uni thing and all the things that people are SUPPOSED to do. But I lived in constant fear of not finding that calling… that thing that you’re supposed to know what it is by aged 10 because all of the decisions that you make from that age onwards define what you will be doing when you are 50 right????!!! FML. How are you supposed to know. I didn’t. And I still don’t.

Now I’m a business and security consultant? (WHAT) and I definitely have imposter syndrome. I know i work hard and most things are so obvious to me which aren’t to other people. And I know my intelligence and work ethic get me through most work challenges but I know that there is so much more I could be doing. My teachers were right I have so much potential! We all do!

So here I am. 25 and unsure of where I’m going to go next. And terrified of not finding that THING which will drive me. I know my brain works differently than most… but now I know my #Linkybrain is not alone and that is definitely comforting but most of all EXCITING. What will we achieve together?