A Gentleman’s impeccable habits in 2015

Without further ado, a list for your consideration:

10: A gentleman always wears fun socks. A brand he favors is Stance.

9: Opening doors for others isn’t staid or irrelevant. A gentleman does so, and never while saying “after you” or “go ahead.” When handled well, everything is implied and understood.

8: When charming a lady, a gentleman warmly invokes his mother in conversation. Once.

7: When indulging in See’s candy, a gentleman never leaves the tiny paper cup in the tray.

6: A gentleman never drinks beer in anything but a glass.

5: Unless it’s deathly hot out. And he’s nowhere near a drinking glass.

4: A gentleman, a tad worried about the increasingly casual office attire environment, suggests “tie Friday” as a means of combating “casual Friday,” which appears to be taking place five days a week.

3: When a lady asks whether “she looks fat” in this, a gentleman emphatically and clearly says “no.” When she asks again, a gentleman expertly and artfully introduces a new topic of conversation.

2: A gentleman prefers to drink wine after 5 p.m.

1: Unless he’s at a baseball game. At which point he isn’t drinking wine at all.

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