Thank you so much for sharing your story. I’m not even sure how I found it, but as soon as I read it, everything made so much more sense to me.
In general I’m a spiritually minded person and something about dieting and most fitness camps never sat right with me. It was all about beating yourself into good health, cruelly, as if you’re the taskmaster and your body is a whipped dog. The whole premise is always, “It’s all for your own good.” Simply put, the general feeling I get from these is they are expressions of self-hatred, as if we are inherently bad the way we are and need to be forced and beaten into submission.
I’d been floundering for a while. I’m not morbidly obese, and actually spent a large portion of my life as a skinny person. I can verify that the things you say about skinny people, the way they think and approach food, are true. In 2013, however, my dad unexpectedly committed suicide after his first cancer treatment, and I turned to food for comfort during that year of mourning. This changed my food behaviors to be unhealthy. Combined with the high levels of antidepressants my doctor put me on during that year, I gained 30 lbs very quickly and haven’t yet been able to get off 20 of it, after 4 years of trying everything from various diets to various exercise routines, even training and completing a 10K didn’t do it. I knew it wasn’t willpower, or lack thereof, because I was the same person I had been for the past 40 years. There was just something… off.
Enter your article which, as soon as I read it, a light bulb went on. Diets and intense exercise routines I hate would be fine, if I hated myself. I don’t hate myself, though, and your method is for people who want to foster love for themselves, which is healthy in more ways that just physical.
I’ve been testing out your methods over the past month or so and I haven’t lost any weight but I feel like I’m still trying to get my bearings and figure out how to pay attention again, and I know I’m moving in the right direction. Thanks again!