2017, an unapologetically superficial roundup

OK, so I waded through the sea of garbage and managed to find a few good things from 2017 and now I’m going to share them with you, in true navel-gazing fashion. It’s pretty much just skincare and television. Oh well!

The best thing I started doing this year

Carrying a notebook everywhere. I got promoted in February (heeyyyy) to a role that requires me to keep track of a lot of people and projects. I bought a dotted Leuchtturm1917 in purple (I know, they’re stupidly expensive but I promise they’re great), and became fanatical about taking notes. When I finished that notebook it was such a thrill; I’m always buying notebooks but struggle with committing to them. Somehow I got comfortable with making a mess on the page and then getting on with my life.

Actually, I started doing this with things like candles and face masks, too, and I totally recommend it. Stop hanging on to these lovely, self-indulgent things because the moment doesn’t seem “special” or “worthy” enough! Use that shit!

Honorable mention: I learned I could boil some six-minute eggs, bring them to the office with me, dunk them in hot water while I’m getting the rest of my lunch together, and magically produce perfect runny yolks. At work! WHHHHAT EVEN. Split them open over rice or greens, add some avocado, dash of hot sauce, whatever you’re into. Add some Trader Joe’s Everything Bagel seasoning on top. Always add some Trader Joe’s Everything Bagel seasoning on top.

The best new movies I saw this year

Last summer I smuggled a thermos of rosé into Girls Trip with my best girlfriends from work and it was so much fun. When our coworker Brian heard about it, he said How dare you see a Queen Latifah movie without me!

Get Out was phenomenal, but you already know that. If we have anything to look forward to about the future, it’s whatever Jordan Peele does next. Relatedly, Wesley Morris wrote this great thing that includes a homage to Continental Breakfast, one of my favorite Key & Peele sketches.

I loved Lady Bird, obviously. I, too, was a high school senior during the 2002–2003 school year so it felt very personal. I felt very seen. So many details just slayed me: the boy names scribbled on the wall, Timothée Chalamet reading A People’s History of the United States at the coffee shop, Saoirse Ronan flopping down onto the grass to rifle through the mail.

I was surprised by how much I enjoyed Baby Driver—I tend to get bored during action movies but occasionally one will strike the right chord. I did feel guilty about watching a Kevin Spacey movie, but it was on a plane so it doesn’t count, right? Ugh, sorry. Here’s to permanently extinguishing all assaulters and misogynists from the planet in 2018!

The best TV shows I watched this year

I kept telling everyone my post-election form of therapy was RuPaul’s Drag Race, which is barely a joke.

In 2017 I watched the Charlie Hides/Trinity Taylor lip sync approximately four thousand times. No regrets!

GLOW was probably my favorite show this year. My friend Ally mentioned in passing that Betty Gilpin reminded her of me, which hands down was the best compliment I received in 2017.

BoJack Horseman, Better Call Saul, and The Americans continue to be amazing. I loved Atlanta so much, but the internet informs me that came out in 2016. Fine! I didn’t really care for Master of None’s second season, but Lena Waithe’s Thanksgiving episode was so funny and poignant.

The best new books I read this year

I finished Goodbye, Vitamin on a flight to Reykjavik in the middle of the night, sobbing quietly all by myself in the last row while passengers waiting in line for the bathroom studiously avoided eye contact.

In January I saw Ottessa Moshfegh read from her short story collection Homesick for Another World at the Harvard Book Store. She is so talented, I love her.

American War really stuck with me, for obvious reasons. I had to skim over some of the historical documents interspersed with the story (zzzzz), but overall it was really compelling and uhhhhhh acutely distressing.

The best makeup I started using this year

The Lunch Money Super Shock Highlighter.

The best non-makeup beauty product I started using this year

My best friend Brenda told me about Curology and it was suuuch a game changer for me. I hardly wear any makeup now! In 2018 I hope to hit peak glowy Glossier model.

The best millennial bullshit I got into this year

I love Blue Apron so much it’s frankly a little humiliating. I used to think it was designed for, like, rich lawyers who make their assistants pick out their kids’ Christmas presents, but as it turns out it’s a luxury I can afford and appreciate. I like to cook, but not having to figure out dinner every week was really key for me during a particularly stressful year. Also—no more ingredients rotting in the fridge! Fewer, anyway.

Goals for 2018

Learn everything about mushrooms and avoid consuming any content in the form of a slideshow.

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