An Issue We Can’t Overlook
“Basically what I want to say is that I can’t really begin to tell you how much the four of us appreciate and feel, um, blessed to be part of something that has become so … to us at least … I’m talking about this community and this scene that we look at every night is so, so beautiful and so unique …” — Trey Anastasio, Sept. 6, 2015.
Toward the end of an epic eight-song encore that closed yet another run at Dick’s last year, Trey addressed the thousands of fans packing the venue as well as the thousands more watching at home with that heartfelt message.
It was a touching moment, one of many that we’ve had the great fortune to witness over the last 33 years. And it was particularly special, not only given what Trey said, but that, in spelling out “Thank You” to the fans, it emphasized that the scene is so strong because we’re all in this together (and we love to take a bath).
There are few things I enjoy more than the music of Phish and the excitement of a show. I love our community and think it’s the rare place where people can be accepted for who they are and what they think because we have the music in common. Choose Phish, come to a show and you’re welcome.
It’s sappy and unrealistic idealism, I know. But that sentiment is why the past few days have been so difficult — because we have a problem.
First, some background
On Nov. 3, I opened Twitter to find a generally gregarious user — a well known and enthusiastic fan — promising to end the next random concertgoer who touches his significant other. It was an uncharacteristic bit of anger, to say the least.
A dive into his timeline identified the source of his ire: Someone grabbed his girlfriend during the second set on Halloween. Other fans had experienced similar problems during the Vegas run, grabbing and groping and other unwanted intrusions.
I wondered whether this was a phenomenon common or exclusive to Vegas. If it was an issue, was it happening more now than before?
And so, in an attempt to at least take measure of what was going on, I posted this rather innocuous question on Twitter:
In minutes, the responses came pouring forth. In the days since I posted that tweet, they filled up social media, from Twitter to Facebook, Reddit and in the Phish.net forum, among others.
Many were distressing, some were harrowing and a few were deeply disturbing.
Some could be charitably classified as harassment — ugly words or gestures directed toward a fan due to her gender — but most were instances of sexual assault, which the U.S. Justice Department defines as, “any type of sexual contact or behavior that occurs without the explicit consent of the recipient.”
While the most severely punished forms of that criminal offense are rape (and attempted rape), child molestation and incest, fondling certainly constitutes sexual assault.
So let’s get this straight from the outset: If you touch someone in a sexual way against their will and without their consent, it is sexual assault and it is a crime. Amazing that we have to start there, but the ensuing discussion on this topic appears to warrant it.
What we know
There is no reliable way to determine the number of assaults that have taken place at Phish shows or at any other shows. I tend to believe that we are far better than others, even though it betrays my bias.
I heard from many women who have had no problems during their time seeing the band. Some travel with friends, others go alone. There were a number of responses expressing the belief that Phish shows are among the safest places to be a woman. That’s incredibly comforting news.
Among those who said they had a problem, there seems to be three broad categories of experiences.
The first seems to be things that happen in lines or when someone moves through a crowd. A guy touches a woman he doesn’t know — say, on the hip or a little lower— and squeezes as he walks down a row of seats. A dude deliberately presses his junk into the woman ahead of him in line, under the auspices of trying to get in the venue or closer to the stage. A hand lingers too long, or moves somewhere inappropriate.
Again, using the Justice Department definitions above, these are crimes if the action are unwanted by the person on the receiving end.
Many of the women who spoke up say this happens regularly at shows of all sort and is a constant bother. Some shrugged it off as part of being a woman in America (which is, in itself, a sad commentary). Others were more forceful in their condemnation.
The second type is a little more unsettling, and involves men — who these women nearly uniformly called “creepers” — who dance too close, invade personal space and get physical during a show. This is confrontational behavior and the women who experienced it said it ruined their experience.
Finally, there were women kissed against their will. Women pushed or hit or knocked down. Men exposing themselves or, in at least one case, openly masturbating during a show. Rape and attempted rape and other types of forcible penetration.
The last 10 days have been filled with deeply disturbing stories of women subjected to all sorts of awful criminal behavior. It took a tremendous amount of bravery for these women to speak up and say these things. And they did so in the hope that people will listen and that we, as a community, will step up.
And so we must.
Plan of action
Generally, the almost uniform conclusion is that (1) we have a problem, (2) our scene is better than a lot of places, and (3) we can do better.
I think the fact that so many people spoke up — dozens upon dozens posting about their experiences — was itself a powerful statement. Folks who weren’t aware of the problem had their eyes opened. That is of vital importance.
There are also the other straightforward steps that we can and should take, all of us. We need to look out for one another. Be more respectful of one another. Speak up for one another. I believe that our scene will be more aware for having this discussion.
Many women emphasized the fact that, while they can and will stand up for themselves, men have to be stronger allies by calling out sexist and misogynistic talk and actions when they see them. We know this is a scene dominated by males and we have a responsibility to shape what comes next.
We need to police our friends and be better about what we allow and what we won’t put up with. We need to call people out when we see this crap. And we need to hold others accountable for their actions.
That’s as true online as IRL. The fact that this discussion unfolded on various social platforms ensured that some would take it as a personal affront and, unencumbered by speaking directly to an individual, could hide behind a user name to victim blame and victim shame and generally dismiss any of these concerns.
Free expression and the First Amendment give them the right to do so. But they should be told forcefully and unequivocally that they are wrong. Listen to these women. Listen to what they’re saying. And be part of the solution.
That’s where we started: With a Twitter user threatening violence should this behavior happen again. That’s not the way to solve this problem, of course, but it will be the result unless better and more reliable options are available.
Toward that end I have reached out to Phish Inc. to see if we can find a way to connect fans directly with the band’s security people, so they can help us help one another.
Stadiums have for years been using technology to identify and remove problem people, issues often identified by their fellow fans. So I have asked if we can establish some type of text message number or Twitter account or other means of reporting dangerous or predatory behavior, either by the victim or potential victim, or by any concerned witness.
I know this may seem a little Big Brother-esque and it could be that there are legal, financial or logistical impediments to establishing such a system. But I would think that the ability to text HELP or JERK to #74474 (PHISH) could put us on the path to eradicating some of the problems being reported by many women (and some men as well) — and that the band would want to be a part of helping make the shows safer for everyone.
MSG, where the band will play Dec. 28-Dec. 31 to conclude their touring year, has such a system in place. But I spoke with a representative from MSG Guest Services who said text messages are not monitored during concerts. In the event of a situation like any of those described above, she recommended finding an usher for assistance.
That’ll be small comfort for those who have dealt with MSG security in the past but, for now, it’s what we have and I would encourage availing yourself of that option should the need arise.
Conclusion
Nobody wants to talk about these issues. They’re uncomfortable for everyone, especially for victims who are forced to relive their experiences as a result.
And certainly nobody wants to think about this type of junk happening at our shows, which should be an escape from this type of deviancy. But it would be naïve to think we’re immune to the problems reported about other concerts and festivals the world over or to ignore the voices of those in our community who are speaking up and asking for action.
For me, what it comes down to is this: I don’t want anything to tarnish what is something so special and that I’ve enjoyed since my first show in 1995. But I am concerned for those who are having their experience ruined on a nightly basis.
Phish shows should be safe places for all, where we can all celebrate this amazing music and this beautiful scene. For inspiration, we should remember how Phish ended that run in Denver last year, with words that should continue to guide us as we tackle this issue:
For united we stand. Divided we fall
And if our backs should ever be against the wall
We’ll be together. Together, you and I.
