From One #SingleMom to Another

Photo Credit: Dorothy Jobira

#Singlemom, don’t be ashamed of your story.

#Singlemom, your situation does not define you.

#Singlemom, you are doing better than you think you are.

Photo Credit: Dorothy Jobira

On Parenting

#Singlemom, know the balance of being a parent first, then a friend. You make their world secure when you lead with calm confidence and make decisions for your child’s best interest.

#Singlemom, your child is your first priority. Not your boyfriend.

#Singlemom, you are enough.

#Singlemom, kids only hear that they are half bad when they hear you putting down their other parent. When they hear you spewing hate for their other parent, they are hearing that they are unworthy of love and belonging. Be oh so careful with your words.

#Singlemom, never use your child to punish your ex. NEVER EVER.

#Singlemom, use more heart and less criticism.

#Singlemom, put your phone down.

Photo Credit: Dorothy Jobira

On Finding Healing and Wholeness

#Singlemom, learn to say “no”.

#Singlemom, take care of yourself first.

#Singlemom, blame and self pity will only keep you from good things. Take responsibility for your life and hold on to the good.

#Singlemom, refuse to internalize their rejection.

#Singlemom, pain carves out your character and adds value to who you are.

Photo Credit: Dorothy Jobira

#Singlemom, you are the prize.

#Singlemom, you aren’t one man’s trash and another man’s treasure. No. You are a treasure, period. You’ve always been a treasure.

#Singlemom, you are so worth it.

#Singlemom, you don’t need someone to tell you things to make you feel good about yourself. Learn to be your own cheerleader.

#Singlemom, you are who you hang out with. Make sure you’ve got good company.

#Singlemom, do the next right thing. Don’t look back. Keep moving.

Photo Credit: Dorothy Jobira

#Singlemom, follow the peace.

#Singlemom, happiness = contentment. Contentment = wholeness.

#Singlemom, when you are willing to be poured out to serve others without losing your own identity or to use it as a manipulation to get something in return and when you can be genuinely content with life as it is right now, you have found a deeper level of wholeness, the kind that won’t lead you wrong.

On Relationships

#Singlemom, you have so much to offer.

#Singlemom, when the time is right, you will get to show your child what healthy dating and healthy love looks like.

#Singlemom, take your time to heal and find wholeness before you love again.

#Singlemom, you don’t have time for distractions that derail you.

#Singlemom, you will reach a point where you don’t have time to mess with anything or anyone that doesn’t improve your life.

#Singlemom, if he constantly criticizes the way you are doing things, he needs healing and you can’t be his doctor.

#Singlemom, if he makes you doubt yourself, he’s not going to have your back when you need him the most.

#Singlemom, if he is offended by your boundaries, he doesn’t care about your heart.

#Singlemom, if he tells you that you make him a better person, he is actually telling you that he isn’t a good person. Let him go.

#Singlemom, if you keep dating the same kind of man, ask yourself what this tendency says about YOU. Damaged people attracted damage. Take time to heal and find wholeness so you attract the same.

#Singlemom, wholeness attracts wholeness. A whole woman may also attract a man who wants wholeness that he doesn’t have yet, so be careful.

#Singlemom, if he obsessively talks about his ex, he hasn’t healed from that relationship. Same goes for you. Some people never do the work and take the time to heal —they just keep going from one hurt to the next one. Stop yourself for as long as it takes to find peace with your exes and heal your heart fully. It’s possible to heal that completely, if you’re willing to do what it takes.

#Singlemom, trust your gut.

#Singlemom, learn to love the sound of your feet walking away from anyone or anything that’s not good for you. Don’t second guess yourself.

#Singlemom, never settle.

#Singlemom, don’t be afraid to love again.

Photo Credit: Dorothy Jobira

In Summary

#Singlemom, you grow through what you go through. Embrace the process. Don’t try to numb the pain.

#Singlemom, at the beginning of each day remember this: There’s grace, hope and love. Give plenty of these three to yourself and others every single day. Because #lovewins.

Disclaimer: I am not a professional and this is not intended to be taken as professional advice. I only share what I have learned and believe to be lessons of truth that I have learned in my journey. I am a healing #singlemom on my way to finding wholeness. It is a process. I’ll never be “perfect” which is why I like to start and end each day on a note of hope. I’m so grateful to each mentor in my life who I’ve learned so much from, including CB and Shannel Barthlow and Pastor Christi Miranda. (And who I’ve borrowed so many of these words from.)

Photo Credit: Dorothy Jobira

Who am I?

My name is Meg. I was born Amish. I’m a creative person. I paint canvases. I tell stories. I work with my cousin at Urban Southern.

I’m also a single mom.

Over ten years ago I got married. Five years ago my dysfunctional marriage was falling apart. Four years ago we separated. Three years ago my daughter and I started a new life in a new city. I’m still single. I’m content MOST days. Each day I learn more about myself. I’m learning to love myself.

Girl, it ain’t easy. But we’ve got this.

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