It’s ok to be awkward.

Run. Hit the door. Hide. Quick. Get out! Don’t breathe. Don’t swallow. Don’t speak.

Realize your feet aren’t moving. Realize you can’t walk out the door. Your legs turn into gel. You are stuck. So stare around the room anxiously. Everyone is staring at you. Look down at your hands; pretend to stare at your phone. Overthink! Everyone probably thinks you are now just staring at your phone not wanting to be there. Maybe someone will talk to me. Maybe I won’t say something stupid. Nope, I probably will. Wait someone is talking to me. Wait they stopped. Stare around uncomfortably and hope no one notices.

This is the life of a socially awkward person in a social setting. Help. Help. I can’t be helped.

I want to make it through this. I want to come off as normal. For once. Please just once. Can I come off normal? If you are lucky and you do. There is still three more times that you have to go through this before you have any chance of being comfortable around anyone. However by that point they already think you are weird and already are judging you.

Get used to the fact this is you. You are who you are. They can’t change you. You can’t change you. They will either accept you or they won’t. Breathe. Remember it doesn’t make you a bad person. It just makes you weird. Weird is ok. It’s ok to be awkward. An only friend told me that once. It’s ok to be awkward. Remember it.

If they judge you they lose out. Accept it. You are a warrior. They walk through it but you stomp on burning stones to be at the same place. You do it. You repeat. You do it!

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